Too Young ~ Larry Stylinson

Six

The boy absentmindedly twisted open the cap, peering inside before he pulled the bottle back from his eye and looking into the mirror, but not actually focusing on it.

'I should write a letter,' he thought.

Part of him wondered if it was a little to cliché, but he figured why not- nobody could judge him when he was gone, right? He set the bottle back down, placing it on the bathroom sink edge, careful to not let it fall, and walked back to his bedroom.

He almost robotically walked over to his desk, the one under his single window, pulling out a piece of paper and pen he found in it. He sighed as he sat down and thought, staring off into space for a moment, before he started.

I'm sure you all saw this coming. You had to. As you all know, or do now since you're reading this, I never could get over Louis. I've always loved him with every part of me, completely. I tried so hard to not, but it's impossible. Part of me wishes I would've never fallen in love so I wouldn't feel this empty, this emotionless, but I know I deserve it. I'm not good enough to be loved. Louis made that clear.

Liam, Zayn, and Niall-

I'm sorry we couldn't make up before I left. I'm sorry that sides had to be chosen and we chose different. Thank you for being there for at least part of it, for being the best friends I could have had. You made me laugh and held me when I cried. Thank you. And I'm sorry for what I'm putting you through and the mess you guys are getting dragged into. You might hate me and think I'm selfish, and maybe I am, but I can't do it anymore. I love you guys so much and whatever happened between us, I'm so sorry and I forgive you for whatever you think you need to be forgiven for. I really mean that. Don't go holding this on your shoulders for the rest of your lives. Especially you, Liam and Niall, I know you're gonna try to. I love all three of you like brothers and distance never changed that.

Mum-

I'm sorry I couldn't see you again before I left. I love you so much and I'm so sorry that one of your babies has to go like this. I'll be watching from heaven and thinking about you every day. Thank you for being the best mum I could have ever had and supporting me in everything. I love you with my whole heart, truly. I'm sorry.

Gemms-

I wish I could've spent more time with you. I love you so much and I want you to be happy. Marry that guy you've been talking about forever okay? I know you're madly in love with him and you deserve everything good. And please be there for mum right now. It's gonna be hard and I'm sorry I can't stay but I can't do this anymore. You are the greatest sister one could have, and I will cherish you from heaven.

Louis-

I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. You probably think I'm pathetic for this, that I couldn't just move on. I think so too, but I love you so much Louis. Everything you did, everything that broke me- I don't hate you for it. I could never. You are and always will be the love of my life, and I'm sorry I wasn't good enough to be yours. I love everything about you. Your gorgeous blue eyes, the crinkles by them when you smile, your body, your laugh, the way you push up the glasses on your nose when you're getting into a really good book. I loved when all you wanted to do was cuddle and I still do. I love everything you do and all the flaws that make you even more perfect. Please be happy and I'm sorry if you hate me even more now, but I will always love you, Lou. Forever and always. Goodbye, Boobear.

I love you all

-Haz

A tear fell from Harry's eye and landed on the paper, smudging a word of ink as he sat back and set the pen down. He folded up the paper perfectly, setting it on the desk with a paperweight and scrawling out the words Louis, Liam, Niall, Zayn, Mum, and Gemma on the top flap.

Harry stood up, smiling faintly at the little piece of paper, looking so innocent on the desk but holding such heavy thoughts, and walked back into the bathroom. He wasn't sobbing anymore, but the tears were still streaming down his face. He knew because they were wetting his hoodie. Louis' actually. Huh.

The boy walked back to the bathroom, picking up the bottle from where he sat it on the counter. Harry smiled sadly, reminiscing as reminders of the life he had lived flashed through his brain like a slide show- just like he had heard about and seen in movies- before he opened the cap for the final time.

He didn't waste any time in what he knew was the inevitable.

He swallowed the first half of the bottle with water from the tap. The second half had to be forced down, his stomach heaving at the overdose of medication being shoved down his throat, too much to be healthy.

When the bottle was gone, having been nearly full when he started except for the two he had taken a couple days ago to help with a hangover's headache, Harry walked back to his bed and layed down on the soft comforter. He felt oddly serene and at peace- a false sense of comfort of what was to come- sitting here and waiting to just go. He closed his eyes and listened to his beating heart in his chest, the one that was so broken, as it slowed, just tiny palpitations. Harry sighed one more time, his eyelids getting droopy, before they slipped shut, sending him into an un-reversable and never-ending sleep.