Our Serenity within the Stars || BTS x Reader

True Self

Ch.48

When you think of Princes, you already have an image of what they're like. They are something straight from a fantasy. A fairy tale. No one could ever be so perfect all the time. An enchanting Prince with styled hair all the time, clean pressed suits, and a handsome face. Mesmerizing eyes and a voice that alone could charm anyone. The charisma of the Prince would be completely unmatched from others. They'd be excellent in their studies as well as fighting. This image...is was near impossible for an actual person to achieve.

Before being a Prince, they're a person. Right? That was the internal battle of Seokjin as he got lost daydreaming during the middle of a lecture. He was staring off at nothing with his mouth open. This was a habit of his that his mentor was frustrated with him. What is he so distracted with? Seokjin didn't mean to drift off like that and yet it always happened. It started the same way and it ended the same way. Seokjin snapped back into reality as soon as his head was hit with a wooden stick. He needed to pull himself together for lectures. His behavior was unacceptable as the Prince of Uranus. He shouldn't be drifting off like this for no reason. Who does that?

"I apologize." Seokjin frowned only to get smacked with the stick again.

"You know how Mother Uranus feels about you frowning." His tutor narrowed their eyes on him. Seokjin straightened his posture, smiling back at the old man only to get smacked again. "Bigger!"

"I apologize!" Seokjin smiled brightly.

It was off settling. The smile on his face was wide and gleaming, but Seokjin's eyes told a different story. Seokjin was used to the muscles in his cheeks stretching like this. He just could never trick his eyes to hide the truth. The windows to his soul revealed what he was truly feeling. What could he possibly do to trick himself? But as long as the smile distracted from his eyes then that would be enough to satisfy the people around him. The more he hides himself, the better. It was what his mother and father insisted on. Those two wanted to live a plastic life. One where they were all perfect mannequins. It was different from the Venusian royal family who only cared about their looks. With Seokjin, it included his entire personality. He was the problem itself.

He was stiff in his seat until he was finally excused by his mentor. He was allowed to leave which he was waiting for. All Seokjin wanted to be was alone. Only in solitude could he find peace. He just needed to keep acting perfect for a little longer. A trained Prince keeping up his image even in the privacy of his home. This was driving him crazy and he didn't know how he was managing to survive this. He was only ten, but he couldn't imagine putting up with this for the rest of his life. This was easily getting tiring to deal with for the sole purpose of making his parents happy. What about making himself happy too? What did he do? What was so wrong with the real him that he couldn't show it?

In all honesty, Seokjin wasn't sure who exactly was the real him. He'd argue that the fake Princely image of him was more developed. It was the side everyone got to see the most. The side people wanted to see. Seokjin collected his things, bowing respectfully at his mentor before walking out at a decent pace. Not too fast and not too slow. Straight back, chin up, and the large smile that was also requested of him. By the time Seokjin arrived back at his bedroom, his cheeks were twitching from how hard it was to keep that smile up. So how come he was still smiling when he entered his room?

Seokjin closed the door behind him and tossed his things onto his bed. He was done with his lessons for today. He could finally relax and learn how to be himself. Seokjin turned his head to face the mirror in his room. He met eyes with someone he couldn't recognize. Was that supposed to be him? Seokjin walked closer to examine himself, touching his styled hair before his eyes landed on that off-putting smile. It was still on his face. Why wouldn't it go away? Seokjin chuckled as he placed his hands on the sides of his face, his shoulders bouncing with his laughs.