Tsunayoshi

four

❝ A FALSE PRETENSE TO HIDE THE TRUTH ❞

...

With his feet on the ground, the feeling of grass against his skin made Tsunayoshi wonder if it was possible to go bare feet for the rest of his life. It was something he hadn't felt since he was alive, there was absolutely nothing that could compare this feeling with when he was dead in the afterlife.

Tsunayoshi twirled around on their front yard, enjoying the sun kissing his skin and the grass beneath his feet before dropping, back flat against the surface.

The sun shined high above, slightly dimmed compared to the bright, blue sky which enveloped the whole world. Tsunayoshi had a smile on his face as he slid his eyes close, listening to the sound of nature.

This was what he missed about being alive, to bask in the sunlight and feel nature.

"Tsu-kun? Oh, my. You worked out how to open the balcony door, didn't you?"

Tsunayoshi snapped his eyes opened at the voice, turning to look at his mother who was smiling at him fondly. He beamed at her, sitting up and holding a hand towards her figure, "Kaa-chan, join me? Lay down too?"

"Okay, okay," His mother laughed, dropping down beside him. She laid down and both of them gaze up at the sky.

Tsunayoshi blinked and watched the clouds, each coming in different shapes. He nudged his mother a little bit, "Kaa-chan, that one looks like a lion."

"Oh my, you're right. That tiny one there looks like a rabbit."

"I wonder if there's a cloud that looks like a person," Tsunayoshi remarked, turning to look at his mother.

She hummed in thought.

"It would be nice if I can see my Tsu-kun in the clouds as well, but he wouldn't be as cute as you." She finished, poking him in the nose. Tsunayoshi scrunched his nose up before smiling.

"Kaa-chan won't look as nice if she's a cloud either," Tsunayoshi agreed.

Because his mother was a beautiful woman who radiated warmth, clouds were too cold to be like his mother. They won't be able to show how good his mother was even if they looked 90% similar. Still, it would be rather nice if a cloud coincidentally morphed into looking like someone he knew.

"I need to head out for groceries soon, does Tsu-kun want to come?" His mother asked, slowly sitting up.

Tsunayoshi practically bounced in excitement at the question. Going out to see things? Absolutely, he hadn't left home since he was born — to his memory, anyway. This was the very first time his mother would offer for him to head out with her.

"Yes, please," Tsunayoshi responded, hugging his mother.

Before they entered the house, his mother told him, "Your father says he might be in Japan soon, so I'll have to make sure the house is restocked."

"Papa's coming back? For real?" Tsunayoshi asked, sounding incredibly doubtful.

Then again, the man hasn't shown his face to Tsunayoshi since forever. Maybe he was there during his birth or something? Not that he can remember.

Tsunayoshi was already three-years-old for the past three months, he was going to be four soon and yet he didn't know what the man looked like beyond the poetic description from his mother and that his name was Sawada Iemitsu (like his namesake's father's name). So, being doubtful about his father's thoughts of coming home was expected.

"He didn't promise." His mother sighed, "But he said he'll be back in Japan, whether or not he can visit is a whole other story."

There it was, he didn't promise to come back.

His father was beginning to sound even more unappealing every time he heard about that man. Tsunayoshi frowned before hugging his mother, which was basically just him hugging her leg.

"It's okay, Kaa-chan," Tsunayoshi said, "I'm here for you even if Papa isn't."

"Ah yes," His mother agreed, carrying him up into her embrace. "My brave little boy, you'll be with me, won't you?"

"Of course," Tsunayoshi gave her a toothy smile, "I love you, Kaa-chan."

"I love you too, Tsu-kun. Now, why don't you go and wear your shoes before waiting for me?"

"Alright," Tsunayoshi nodded, lingering at the door.

He sat down and reached for the tiny shoes he never wore before. It was shiny clean with orange and red lighting by the side along with black soles. Once he slipped it on, Tsunayoshi frowned a little bit. It felt weird now that his whole feet were covered, he could no longer feel the wind or the grass beneath his feet.

What a shame.

"Kaa-chan, can I not wear shoes?" Tsunayoshi asked, voice pitching louder than normal.

His mother appeared at the base of the staircase with a frown on her face, "Absolutely not. Your feet will get hurt, wearing shoes helps avoid that. And there are a lot of nasty things that like attacking people from their feet, you don't want that, do you?"

Tsunayoshi shook his head, still frowning.

Well, obviously he didn't want any unwanted things to get on his feet — he remembered hearing something about ringworms before? — but still, the feeling of something covering his feet was almost annoying.

Well, at the very least, he didn't have to wear any shoes at home.

"Now then," his mother held her hand down, "Hold my hand, Tsu-kun. No matter what, you don't let go. Understand?"

"Okay," Tsunayoshi agreed easily, slipping his chubby hands into her larger ones.

When they left the house, Tsunayoshi felt a chill down his spine. He eyed the exit gate with a sense of foreboding, for some reason, something tells him that he wouldn't be enjoying today as much as he thought he would.

And that was proven once they reached the market square.

"Is that?"

Tsunayoshi froze, his eyes focused on the road ahead. Despite him wanting to just observe the design of the buildings around, his focus was pulled away by the soft whispering of Namimori residents and the rude pointing at his mother. His mother had a smile on her face as if she could take on the world and have zero problems with it.

"It is, so that's the one."

"He's a—"

"Shh, the child has done nothing wrong."

"But the mother, she's one, isn't she?"

"Well, she's not working and there's no man at home, right? So, it has to be true."

"Can't believe it, such a nice looking lady."

"All the nice ones are the ones to watch out for, I suppose."

Tsunayoshi frowned, straining his ears even more. Were they bad mouthing his mother? The literal best woman in the universe who put up with that absent father of his, do nothing more than yell only when it concerns Tsunayoshi and put on a smile every day despite raising him as a single mum? They were trash-talking his mother?

"It's always the quiet ones."

"But the boy, he's still that, a child."

"A child of a whore."

Tsunayoshi froze before his blood boiled, eyes glinting amber at the word. He turned around and glared, memorising the faces of those who had just slandered his mother. Unfortunately, his mother realised and rested her hand gently on his head.

"Kaa-chan?" Tsunayoshi called out, looking up at her.

His mother smiled down at him, "Hm? We're almost there, Tsu-kun. Don't worry, we're almost there."

Tsunayoshi stared, properly looking at the smile which was currently plastered on his mother's face. He realised that his mother's smile wasn't as warm as the one at home. Her eyes didn't feel as expressive as the one which would look at him with love. He realised with no small amount of horror that his mother's smile right now was fake.

Edited - 20/08/2023