You May Call It Wrong But I Call It LOVE (boyxboy)

Chapter 4

Chapter 4

Jazz's P.O.V

Its been 3 weeks since everything has happened, his parents death, us admitting being gay and becoming a couple.

Well, nothing has really happened. At school no one new we were a gay couple even though we were going to become public. Well thats never happened even when we go outside we never do anything not even hold hands. Even when i want to i would brush my hand against his as an attempt but he just moves away. I mean i understand hes nervous so am i also having to deal with the lose of his parents is even worse.

But after about a week ago he has been normal and he was acting how he used to act, well except for the gay part. I am hopeing that today will will show that we are a couple because i cant hide behind these invisible bars any longer.

My mom keeps telling me to wait and the time will come but i cant take it any longer. Today while we wait for an hour i am going to talk to him about this, it cant be ignored any longer.

I found him at his usual spot near my locker and walked towards him.

"hey Zane, um we need to talk" and i grabbed his bag that was still attachted to him and pulled him towards the "haunted" hallway, our hallway.

"Jazzz what" he pushed me away from him.

"whats wrong with you zane seriously. I dont you want me to talk about us as a couple or being gay around others, since you have shyed away from me everytime i try to touch you also what happened to, ill go public with you i dont care what others think as long as i have you?" i was kindof screaming because i was alittle mad but i was more scared then anything i was afraid to know the truth.

"Jazz im scared alright ok of what others think, ive had to turn down so many desperate girls l have almost said yes to them because i DIDNT want people to get ideas of me being gay do you know what would happen, no you dont everyone thinks of you as a loner no one thinks these things about you, because to them you're a nobody your not popular like me Jazz its alot worse for me then it is for you." i just looked at him and new i had tears running down my face. His words hurt more than anthing and i cant believe he said that , but what i cant believe is what i did.

I shoved him into the wall as hard as i could and said,"FUCK YOU ZANE JUST FUCK OFF, GOD I FUCKING HATE YOU!!!" i screamed at his face and his face filled with sorrow and fear and my voice faltered at the end and i fell to the ground crying so hard.

Zane dropped down instantly feeling horrible because of the things he said to me, but when he tryed to grab me and pull me in close to him i pushed him away and said, "Dont touch me Zane" My voice was full of hatred and pain and Zane recoiled back.

"Jazz im so sorry i dont know i didnt mean it to come out that way ok can you please forgive me i am so so SOOO sorry," he was crying and i wanted to believe him but, i just couldnt he still said it an meant it at the time, it will take alot for me to ever forgive him.

"Zane it doesnt matter you still said it plus you dont even want to be seen with me its like your ashamed to be with me, plus its going to take alot more than that to get me to forgive you." i brought my knees up to my chest and held my knees and buried my face deep inside of my knees.

"Jazz look at me" he pulled me over ot him even though i tried to stay but he was still too strong and i was pulled anyway," i am NOT NOOTT ashamed of being your boyfriend i dont EVER EVER want to hear you say that ever again do you hear me i love you Jazz alright" i nodded and he continued," i am so going to make it up to you today ok"

"Zane i want to forgive you but i just need to believe you so i will wiat until i see what you are going to do"i paused an smiled,"i love you soo much Zane" i smiled at him and he leaned in an gave me a passionate kiss that was interupted by the warning bell.

authors note:

sorry its short but ive been busy im gona write again really soon an hopefully it will be longer XD peace out XD