"Can we get a Techno child in the chat?"

Draw the lines

As Dream suffered through what can only by described as near instant karma, he accepted his lot in life with as much dignity and grace as he could muster.

So he struggled like a drowning fish.

He tried to spit out every single last bit of the concoction. He tried (and succeeded) in headbutting George. He tried kicking Sapnap. He tried all that and more and yet...

George let him go after he'd drank every last bit of it. He stumbled forward, gasped for air, and gave the other two his most menacing glare.

The trio regained their breath.

...

"Well," Sapnap said "that was anticlimactic."

"What was that even supposed to do?" George asked.

Dream didn't feel anything, but he wasn't going to chance it. "It was just milk! Milk! Normal regular milk. Also bye." And with that he turned around and speedwalked to his room.

Followed by the voices of his housemates, Dream closed the door behind him. He turned to lock it but he had to struggle as the lock was oddly high up.

Wait a second.

One.

Okay, go.

Dream locked the door with frantic speed, fumbling it twice in the process. He ran to his window, closed the curtains but kept it unlocked, just in case.

The two truly evil men who had done this to him were outside his door, but Dream ignored them for now to examine himself in the mirror.

He looked horrendous. He took pride in his glare that could make any Bad cry. And now...

Dream was cute. He was adorable. There was no other way to put it. It was like you got a child model with a phd in cute to and give him a Dream costume.

He tried his angry glare. Big mistake. It made him look kind of like he was pouting, and terribly peeved with how things were going.

He just looked like a nine year old getting teased.

God, this was what Tommy saw in the mirror everyday? How did the child do it?

Maybe he should be just a tad nicer to him.

...

Hah. Being nice to Tommy. Imagine.

He turned back towards the door. He was going to have to-oh God no the door was open.

On the other side stood George and Sapnap, mouth agape. Frozen in shock, staring at him.

Do something.

Dream struck a pose. "Like what you see, boys?"

Sapnap and George were still staring, but his comment had been the catalyst their minds desperately needed to reattach themselves to reality.

"Cause if you like it, I'm calling the police."

George and Sapnap simultaneously snapped out of their stupor, and while Sapnap pulled out his phone, George bounded forward and scooped the smol Dream up.

"You are just so cute! Ah, is this what you looked like as a kid? We're gonna take pictures, right, now."

"Stranger danger?"

"We live together, Dream."

"I do not consent?"

"To what?"

"To everything."

"Too late on the photos, buddy." Sapnap said with his phone ready. "Say cheese!"

"Cheese!" George happily said smiling at the camera.

Dream bit George in the arm.

The photo Sapnap took was a blurry mess. The only clearly identifiable feature was George face screaming in pain, with a tiny green blob hanging onto his arm.

"Aagh! Dream! Why!?"

Dream wiggled out of George's grasp and ran past Sapnap. "Stranger danger!"

Dream ran because he had a feeling about how this would go. They would first be like; 'wow, you're cute and handsome and smart and truly better than me at manhunt.' then they would go; 'but what if we made you more cute?' and then he would suffer.

More than he already did on a daily basis.

He barely stopped at the door, flinging it open and immediately sprinting out.

He may or may not have totally forgotten that they were getting visitors. And that they were supposed to arrive a while ago. And that they could be right behind the door.

Turns out, Techno was much softer then he'd imagine he would be. Also shorter. Also weirdly good at tumbling down hills in a pile of limbs. How was he so aerodynamic?

Tumbling down a hill was strangely pleasant if you kept landing on a pig.

When they finally stopped, he had the answer to all his questions. Techno was also a child, and also adorable. Even more cute than he was, and not by a small margin, he found.

It wasn't at all that he didn't want to be cute, and was trying to think that there was no was he was cuter then Techno. That had nothing to do with anything.

He quickly considered leaving him behind as bait, but seeing as Techno had cushioned his fall, and that Techno knew where he lived, he decided to save him from George and Sapnap.

He told Techno to follow him, and ran into the nearby forest.

More of a park really. But it had a lot of trees for a park. A forest park? A park forest? He ran into the nearby park forest. No wait, that sounded awful. Wasn't Techno an English major? Wouldn't he know how to make it sound cool and mysterious without just lying.

"Hey Techno, what's a cool synonym for park forest?"

Nope. Right out. That sounded awful. And asking people 'bout words was Tommy's bit. He didn't need to be more like Tommy than he already was.

How should he ask Techno then? A joke? Play it off, real smooth. All you need is to make a dumb comment and have Techno correct you. Easy, everytime. What could possibly go wrong?

"Dude, you threw me down a hill as a small child, ask me to come with you with no explanation, and the next thig you do is ask for a synonym for, and I repeat this, 'park forest'. Glad to see you have your priorities straight. I'd call it a forested glade, both tamed by civilization and surrounded by it, though personally I now prefer 'park forest'."

"I asked you that out loud?" Dream whimpered.

"Everything you've been thinking you said out loud. I just couldn't ignore the comedic timing. It forces me, to do unspeakable things."

"What kind of things?"

"Stab orphaned children."

"That has nothing to do with comedic timing."

Techno pulled out a pocket knife. "It does now."

"Wait no let me explain!"