The Diary Of Avalynn.

chapter 4.

After coming out of the washroom, she went to Leah and bought some clothes from h and m's and a diary too. Aurelia mostly wore loose clothes because she thought her breasts were too big. She was insecure about everything. She even hated skinny clothes.

After they had done shopping, they went back to the car. Leah kept the bags at the back seat.
"So, who is Dylan?" leah said starting the car.
"I don't really know him. He had stopped me in the school when i was going to my biology class and wanted to talk to me. Its not what you are thinking." Aurelia said.
"Oh i wasn't thinking anything. I guess.." she paused and started smiling.
"What ever you are guessing is wrong." Aurelia said smiling although she didn't want to. "I just wanna be friends with him nothing else." actually she didn't even want to be his friend.
"Ok then its upto you but he is a gentleman." Leah winked. Aurelia sighed. She didn't need a boyfriend, atleast now right now. They had gone to the mall for an hour but she felt already tired. She couldn't understand why she kept feeling tired everytime.

If she opened up to someone about her current situation, they would start talking about themselves and say,' at this age you feel like this, its normal not a big issue. You body is growing now and that's why you are tired.'

She knows that her body is growing but this thought didn't satisfy her. A person would feel tired after doing a work out for an hour not after sleeping for 10 hours. She didn't open about this to anyone but now she had bought a diary, maybe she could write about it.

They had reached home. She took out her bags and went upstairs to keep it. She took out her diary and admired it. It was a vintage diary. She could draw things in it and write about her feelings. But right now all she wanted to do was sleep although it was only 9pm.
She heard a knock on the door. She went to open it, it was Leah.
"You wanna have dinner?"
"Nah i am not really hungry."
"Ok. What are you gonna have for breakfast?"
"Eggs and bread."
"Ok good night."
"Good night." she closed the door and went to change her clothes. Tomorrow was going to be her second day in the school. She sighed. She had to really avoid Dylan. She knew he wanted to be friends but she didn't. Plus he had many friends and she never did well with people. First she used to fight for having friends, now she wants to let go and don't want to stay with people. She took out her shirt and looked at her stomach. She had grown so thin. She never wanted to be so thin. Its just that she never felt hungry. She quickly put another shirt on because she didn't want to get negative thoughts again. She changed her lower too. Then she went back to her bed.

Negative thoughts are river, you can't stop them and if you do they keep filling up and burst one day. She finally closed her eyes and went to sleep. Tomorrow was going to be a long day.