Rushing Water

Epilogue

Bereaved
(adjective)

1. Suffering the death of a loved one.

—

Breathing.
Collected and calm.

Inhale.
Exhale.
Inhale.
Exhale.

He lifted his head, brushing the fluffy blond hair from his face and pushing the silver-framed glasses further up on his nose.
"Eijirou."

The name escaped his lips subconsciously and an anxious hand reached for the bracelet on his wrist to twist it nervously.

Two years.
Two long years without the joyful redhead.

Without seeing his relaxed face in the morning, seeing that fiery red hair wether it was spiked or down, those ruby eyes that revealed his every emotion, the soft skin beneath his touch. Spiky teeth that peeked through his occasional small smiles. Warm hands and welcoming hugs. Reassuring words he whispered and gentle fingers that traced skin or tangled themselves in hair.

It was a struggle, he'd admit that in a heartbeat. Each day the wake up was the same.
What am I doing?
Goddamnit I miss you...

Every day hurt.
But that was to be expected.

The first month was spent in his room, eyes always swollen, nose always running, hands always shaking.
The second was calmer, but he was sensitive to even hearing his name.
Month three was better as he slowly came back to himself.
Month four he crumbled again.

A simple drawstring bracelet caught his attention in month five.
Nothing too special or even very noticeable.

But to him it meant the world.

Eijirou loved small knick-knacks, childish jewelry and stuffed animals or cool things he'd find. So, for Bakugou, it was so much more than a plain little bracelet.

It was Eijirou.
Bright but simple, small and easily hidden, but beautiful.
Beautiful.

Fingers traced the gravestone just as his had traced Katsuki's hand that day so many years, and he smiled weakly.

"Eijirou."

Inhale.
Exhale.
Inhale.
Exhale.

"We both know this isn't gonna be some extravagant speech of me proclaiming my undying love and loyalty to you, because I don't have to. You already have it. Since day one. I just...I wanted to see you again. Yeah yeah, I know I set it to once a week to help deal with the pain but I needed it today."

You've got this.

"Listen up fucker, you better be kicking ass up there. You better be training and prepared for when we meet because you can count on me making sure you've been on top of your studies. You should be able to beat my ass no problem, no excuses. And please..."

Don't break now...

"Please be waiting for me. I know it sounds selfish, desperate, hopeless. But I can't help but think you'd wait for me. I never gave up on you. You broke a promise we made so...so it's the least you can do. I- I'm sorry."

Hold it together dumbass!

I let him go.
No, I didn't let him go...

"I'm sorry I wasn't there as much as you needed. I'm sorry I didn't persist more, make you talk. I'm sorry I got there too late. I... God I love you more than what I can even begin to describe.

"I love your laugh, your smile, that stupid hairstyle you used to do, those shining eyes. Even as they began to slowly dull as your will to live- as that disappeared with time. I love everything about you. As much as it's all tried fading from memory. I'm hanging on. Hanging on to everything. Because I'm not ready to let you go yet.
I love you."

Just a little more and you can go...talk to him.

"And I'm always going to. No matter what dumbass nerd comes along and is just as annoying and stubborn as you. Because he isn't you. No one is or will be. And that's what's so special about you, dumbass. It's something you didn't see.

"I'm gonna go for a while but you better bet on me coming back. I'm not leaving you forever. I can't. So, I'll be back. Just give me time."

I love you.

By the time I got there the rushing water had already closed up after him...

The rushing water.

Rushing Water.

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Word count: 694