LONELINESS | Jasper Hale [2]

~CHAPTER 4: FINE~

WARNING!!
if you can be triggered by thoughts of suicide or self harm, then please skip the parts that make you feel triggered!!!

FEW WEEKS have passed since the Cullens left. It was November now and Bella was getting worse everyday. At first she stopped speaking and started staying in her room more and more. Then she stopped eating, showering and even looking at me or Charlie.

And now, came the nightmares. Bella was screaming in her sleep, as if she was in horrible pain. Sometimes she would be screaming without any logical words, but then there were the nights when Charlie and I would wake up to a name being screamed out.

Edward.

That's how my hatred towards the copper haired vampire grew stronger every day.

For weeks I have been holding my own pain inside, trying to focus on Bella who was barely functioning and Charlie who was feeling powerless in this situation.

"I don't know what to do anymore Thea... she's getting worse. The only thing she's been doing is sitting by that damn window and writing something on her laptop" said Charlie as we were eating dinner in the kitchen.

I looked at him and felt the pain in my chest deepen. The man who took me in, was looking so tired and lost. So powerless.

"It's all his fault..." said a voice inside my head, making my blood boil.

I put down my fork and said "We need to give her time. She'll get better with time"

Charlie let out a deep tired sigh saying "How do you know that? Maybe I should send her back to her mother for a while... a change of scenery could help her"

"That's not a good idea. I mean. She already had a lot of changes in her life, so I doubt that she needs another one" I explained calmly, trying to smile softly at Charlie like I used to. But it came out forced and tight, feeling alien on my lips.

The Chief nodded slowly, before looking at me asking "And how are you doing? I know that, I seem more focused on Bella but I can see that you're hurting just as much as she is. Maybe even more so..."

I looked away from him, the hollow feeling in my chest becoming too much for me to ignore. But still I turned back and looked at him with a trained fake smile saying.

"I'm fine"

Before Charlie could say something, I got up and walked to the counter taking a clean plate and placing a portion of lasagna on it, saying "I'll take it to Bella. Maybe she'll eat"

With that said I left the kitchen and went up stairs. There I gently knocked on Bella's door saying "Hey, Bella I brought you some food"

Silence was the only response that I've got, so I sighed deeply and opened the door. And there she was. Sitting on the chair near the window, staring into nothing.