Bend & Break | Wooyoung [Ongoing]

3 | he's a lost cause, it's bin-decided

Him.

EPIPHANY WAS OUR CENTRAL PERK. Our safe place, a sure bet for cheap chow. That one spot everyone made out time for, because it brought everyone together.

Yunho: Youngwoo's PRO, reserved and bubbly—he made both work somehow. Ryujin and Saerom: best friends, the more expressive version of what Changbin and I shared, home owners—bought their own apartment together after college. (Ryujin always had news. That was how great life was going for her. Saerom claimed she was content walking dogs and manning the bar at a rundown pub at night for a living— month on, a month off—and maybe she was. I was just so haughty-minded that I placed standards.) Then Eric: the foreigner, he spoke English so well we all wished in our hearts to be like him. (Subliminally, maybe that's why we kept him around. Eric co-owned a gym where he let me use the equipment for free, and refused to let me have a membership.)

I had great friends. We were great people, but some were just better than others. To be precise, all of them were better than me.

Epiphany wasn't the best spot out there, but there was a significance that labelling attached to things. But I bet there were memories too. You could even add the the article and call it The Epiphany instead of you wanted to. Which in essence was the other beauty of this place, one might say. These kind of trivial options laid out for you, the inconsequentiality kindling the tiniest bit of importance in a person who then discovered, in their mopes, how they did need those options.

Changbin and I mostly rendezvoused here during his work breaks. For an introvert, there were quite a lot of things he didn't like to do alone. We would get together and order black-bean noodles. Black-bean noodles was the rule—every. single. time. We didn't like change so we preferred to stick with it.

Changbin was running late today. I guess it happens when you're a busy person, something I've gone and lost touch with. I was free time in human form now. But Changbin had a boss who really liked him. I kid you not he could compose an entire song for the guy. I thought Changbin's work scene was much easier scene to thrive in. Given that entertainment focalized everything—how to entertain and be entertained. Give something, get in return. You know, sort of quid pro quo.

I requested water while I wait because I enjoyed having conversations over an empty stomach filling up. With black-bean noodles. We never missed out on the chance to spend his lunch breaks together, we thought it strengthened the friendship. Once he gets here, we would order coke—no alcohol. He tried to compromise on my behalf.

From my seat, I did what I did best with free time. Watched and judged. Epiphany—the—was half-full with paying patrons, like my glass of water. There were as many occupied seats as there were empty ones, there was a balance. Another thing to love: it was never more than this. Enough people to give you that sense of being surrounded, yet not too much to feel invaded by.

There was the hoard of teenagers chatting behind me. They were too deep-seated in their exchange of ideas and opinions, perhaps sentiments, to care for the loner in a white sweater. A platinum blonde man occupied the next two tables, a younger man sat across from him, conversation was also flowing. My attention returned to the high schoolers. At this time of day, it was definitely ditching. As a senior then, I would skip almost as a way of life but stopped when my mom started manipulating me with fake heart attacks. There was also a woman dutifully picking out onions from her noodles. I was annoyed because I did not like when people tampered with natural order.

Changbin suddenly emerged from the entrance and I stopped short on analyzing a middle-aged man in a plaid shirt.

"You're late," I said, by way of greeting.

"Yes, but you were expecting it," he said, by way of apology that didn't sound like one. "You ordered water."

I raised a brow and let it hang, waiting for him to realize he had just rendered me confused.