I remember the days
when we promised we'll stay together til the end
that we'll grow old together
planning our fanciest marriages
and our future trips all around the world
i never thought things would turn out the way it did
i was here for you
in the stormy nights
you needed a shoulder to lean on
and i happened to be here
but little did i know what was coming
sometimes I wonder
when did it start to change?
why did you start to let me down?
I thought I was just being selfish
and kept on focusing on your problems
rather than allowing myself to not feel okay
I tried to reach out
to look for the help I gave you
I thought you'd be here when I felt down
turns out you never came
it was the first time you abandoned me
but you were there in the happy moments
I thought I was just being selfish again
and that, deep down, nothing changed
after all, you were going through rough times
you would have been there for me if you were feeling better, right?
but I never had the answer
I let that slide
again
because it's easier
after all, we always smile when we're together, right?
we're always happy.
As if nothing ever happened.
But I guess I was the only one that cared
writing this feels like I wanted more than just friendship
at some point I did
I had mistaken my pure and innocent admiration for you
for something else
it hurt, at that time
all those people you dated
I knew I would never be enough
but, if I told you
would you have played with my feelings as well?
Would you have liked me?
Made me hope, but never really front me?
Would I have been even more broken than I am right now?
Took me a while to realize that I didn't love you
