Once upon a time (Bill Kaulitz fanfiction)

Chapter 7

Though the vocal training had been easy, we were still rehearsing again a few minutes before the audition, just in case. I had chosen my blue bikini, the lilac sarong and a hibiscus-flower shaped pin in my chestnut hair.

We had a good feeling walking towards the jury's table on the beach with our mikes in hand and seeing them smile at us, especially the twins:

"Aren't they sweet…" Tom said.

"Yeah, they look so cute!" Bill added.

I couldn't prevent myself from giggling at what he said. Somebody please make me stop, was I turning crazy?

"So guys, get ready and good luck." Dieter said and the band started to play.

"I make them good girls go bad
I make them good girls go
Good girls go bad

I know your type
you're daddy's little girl
Just take a bite
Let me shake up your world…"

For the first time since I was on the show, I didn't feel alone. I knew I could count on Bojan as well as he counted on me. His voice was incredible and he was a fun partner.

"I know your type
Boy, you're dangerous
Yeah, you're that guy
I'd be stupid to trust
But just one night couldn't be so wrong
You make me wanna lose control…"

We playfully danced and sang together while looking in each other's eyes. He even set some flirty moves on me -which we both knew was all for fun. I ended the song in his arms -like it was planned- and we both turned our heads at the jury. My heart suddenly started to pound like hell again as we were catching our breath.

Tom was the first to start:

"Bojan, Lola… Bill and I are fans of you and you know that. I loved your performance. I think you're both great and I wish you good luck for the rest."

Bill was as enthusiastic as his brother. I was glad he also liked Bojan a lot:

"I want to see both go further in the competition. Lola, I think you're wonderful and it's my honest opinion."

These words sounded like music from heaven to my ears and I felt my brain fly away to the sound of it.

"With Tom and Bill by your side, you also got me." Mateo continued. "Bojan, you're an artist. And Lola, I think you're cute and have a unique personality."

Bojan's smile was wider than ever, along with mine. Oh the sweet taste of peace before the sky fell on our heads.

"I'd also find the performance very good…" The surnamed pop-titan slowly started "…with the sound turned off."

…What?

Even Bill turned his head at the cold critic. I didn't get it. I didn't feel like we hadn't found the tune right and we had all the lyrics…

"When you sing, Lola… I see an eight-year-old girl than got lost in a club. There was no feeling. And the singing had nothing to do with the song."

I felt my eyes widen at the statement and automatically looked at Bill who was doing the same with me. Despite the huge sunglasses, one could easily tell that he had been glaring at Dieter the whole time.

"Thank you, that'll be all." He said as we turned around and walked away in silence, feeling like an ice-cold shower after a warm bath.

We gave our mikes back to the staff and Bojan put his arms around my neck. I quickly took a last glance back over my shoulder at Bill, who was now staring at the table in front of him with a worried face. Though we knew he meant every critic, Dieter's warning was clear: just because I was the not-so-secret protégée of one of the new young judges didn't mean I was safe –which I actually never thought-: he was still the boss. He was the oldest, the most professional of them all and if we wanted me out – not only because he didn't trust my potential anymore but for the show's sake as well-, he could.

"I absolutely don't agree with Dieter, you were great." Bojan told me after our last interview.

"Thank you... You were still the best."

He grinned as usual and took out his cap to brush the sweat away from his hair. We still got a couple of hours before they split us again in other groups for the evening...

"…Wanna go get some ice-cream?"

"I thought you'd never ask!" I said and we both ran to the bar as fast as we could, laughing.

Though I was trying to think about something else, I was still trying to understand why my favorite judge was that pissed. Even hours after the event, I still had no answer. But there was no time to think about it now:

"Is your throat better, Emily?"

"No… I guess I'll have no choice now but to deal with it tonight."

"Does it hurt?"

"Like hell."

What if, in the end, I just didn't have what it takes?

I was amazed to find out that everybody knew Bill seemed to have "a thing" on me; some of them were pissed like Dieter, some of them found it cute and –thank god- some others didn't care. My group belonged to that side. Did I sound that much like a toddler?

"Claudia, what's wrong?"

"I can't find my shoes!"

"Well, find them! The show begins in an hour or so!"

"I know!"

Will I indeed end up trying to please more Bill than the rest of the jury?

"Lola, can you help me with the lyrics? I can't remember the last verse."

"I told you, it's just the same as the rest, except it goes:

Here comes the rain again
Falling on my head like a memory
Falling on my head like a new emotion…"

"Alright thanks."

Was it all just a big mistake?

I loved Eurythmics, Annie Lenox's voice was one of my top ten favorite. Plus her voice was so deep I had to lower mine to fit the melody, so I obviously wouldn't sound like a child anymore. I was glad Claudia had brought it up.

I couldn't lie on the interview. The hell if my family knew what I was thinking: I just didn't feel like I belonged in here anymore. The pressure was too big and I didn't know how long I would hold on, especially if it was supposed to get harder and harder -if not lasting for a whole lifetime in the end. But I had at least to fight for the people who did the same for me. Do it for the twins. Do it for Bill.

But I had the feeling this wouldn't be enough for tonight. Dieter was mad again but I wasn't the only one responsible.

"Girls, what's wrong with you?" He exclaimed. "This is DSDS, the sixth recall! And you," He said, pointing at Claudia, "come to perform with no shoes on. And you" he then pointed at Alice, "come out with your text in hand, like you were still practicing. Except you're now on air! People are watching you!"

Yes, they were. Our parents, brothers, sisters, cousins and friends were watching us at this very moment. Mine would see me fight up to the end. And if it wasn't enough… Well, let's hope it would be. Even Bill nodded in agreement, which made me feel sorry for the four of us.

""Here comes the rain again" by Eurythmics… Ok, good luck, girls." Dieter added in a grunt and made us start.

We tried as hard as we could. As a result: Claudia forgot a quarter of her part, Emily's voice was back but she also forgot her text, so only Alice and I did our best with our voices and memories intact. Once again, I sheltered in Bill's eyes who was looking at me too, but wasn't smiling anymore.

At the end of the performance, everybody –the jury, the audience, the four of us- agreed on one thing: it sucked. A lot. But most of all, all eyes were on Dieter who first looked at us, then looked at Bill, then sighed and talked to me with an annoyed look:

"…When I hear you singing, it's like a little mouse fighting for its life. There's nothing else I can say."

The sky cracked opened and lightning streaked the sky… except it wasn't a metaphor. The rain started to fall and everybody ran away from the set, looking for a place to stay dry. Oh the irony that the rain was now falling on my head like a tragedy, falling on my head like a new emotion, with no-one to talk to me like lovers do… This was the end.