You Accepted Me!

Pha, It's NOT our Fault

Beam had called to meet Pha for coffee without Kit or Forth. Phana sat at the Second Cup on campus, nursing his cup of coffee, looking at his social media while waiting for Beam. They rarely spent any time alone together, even before Beam had started dating Forth. His curiosity was almost killing him

Beam slid into to the booth, carrying a bottle of water and a cup of Americano. "Pha, how are you?" he said with a slight smile that didn't quite reach his eyes.

Pha simply nodded, and without much fanfare, "Am I beating someone up for you, Beam? I thought Forth would take care of that now."

Beam laughed, and said, "No, I'm not in trouble. We are in trouble." With a wave of his hand to indicate both of them.

Pha wrinkled his brow and thought hard. He had only studied over the weekend. How could that get him into trouble.

"Pha," Beam started, "Have you talked to your family lately?"

"Umm, kinda." Pha started, surprised. He didn't like talking about it. His parents were suddenly getting a messy divorce and they weren't talking to either him or his brothers about why. "I've been avoiding both of them because of the divorce."

"What would you say if I told you I knew why your parents are getting a divorce." Beam said slowly, since there really was no way to say this.

"I'd say you were lying but you never lie. Besides, if your family really wants information, you can find out." Phana looked really closely at Beam. "You do know why they're divorcing. When did you find out?"

"Saturday night. My mother came by to tell me."

"Oh my god," Phana sighed. "That must of hurt. I'm surprised you talked to her."

"I didn't, Pha. I listened. And I wouldn't have even listened if she wouldn't have come with Mom." Beam replied softly.

"Mom?"

"Oh, Forth's Mom. Ever since I was disowned, his parents have taken me in and insisted since I'm marrying Forth eventually I may as well call them Mom and Dad. But that's besides the point." Beam shook his head. "It's a lot to process, and I'm real sorry Forth knows, Pha. He won't talk about this, but you need to know, too."

"Are you trying to tell me this is really bad news?" Beam nodded.

Pha sighed and then looked him directly in the eye. "Fine. Tell me. I'll tell my brothers and we can decide what to do."

"My father had an affair with your mother. Your brothers are my brothers as well. They are not your father's biological sons." Beam just blurted it out, because in the end, it really didn't matter how it was said, Phana was going to hurt.

"Fuck you, Beam. That is not funny. Now, what is the real story?" Phana slapped the table, hurting his palm.

Beam just looked at him sadly and Phana's shoulders started to slump. "You weren't joking?" His hands started to shake and he looked desperately at Beam. "Please, tell me you were joking... "

Beam reached over and held those trembling hands. "I had Forth to hold my hand, Pha. He helped me cope with the emotional overload. Do you want to stay for a while?"

"No, no. I'll be okay once I process this." Phana looked at Beam and intuitively said, "That's not everything is it?"

"No, my ex-father is a right asshat. He needs your mother single in order to make your brother heir to the company. He didn't want a gay boy as his heir." Beam gave a wry laugh. "I think he was planning this since we were 13, Pha."

"Is it wrong of me, Beam, that I'm only worried about my dad?" Pha laid his head on the table, hiding his eyes, although his voice was still quite strong.

"No, I think it's good." softly, as comforting as he could be. "Your brothers are young and quite flexible. They'll adapt easily but the older we get, the more easily we hurt."

Pha lifted his head and looked at Beam, "Why do you think my mom did it?"

"Who knows? My mom is convinced my dad is pure evil, Pha. Maybe he bought her out?" Beam tried to remember back then but seriously, he was so small. It seemed like Phana had always been around. "Phana, do you remember how old you were when you moved into your big house?"

Phana thought hard, and slammed his hand down hard on the table again. "Oh yeah, I do. I was five. I was mad because I had to change schools. The reason was because mom was pregnant." He gave a wry, self depreciating laugh, "Looking back, you were the only good thing, Beam. You and Kit."

"Speaking of Kit, Pha, are we going to tell him of this? Or are we going to wait until the formal announcement comes out and pretend surprise?" Beam asked. "I'll go with whatever you decide."

"Can you give me some time to think? I also need to talk with my brothers about this."

"Sure, just let me know." Beam stood up, "Pha... if you need me, call anytime."

As Beam left the cafe, he turned and looked back at Phana still sitting at the table, looking lost and hurt. How could such an evil man hurt so many people for his own pleasure?

Phana, lost in his own thoughts, had turned them to something that was consistently on his mind ever since the moon contest had begun: Wayo.

Right now, he really wanted comfort and seeing his small, sweet Wayo would have brought him such joy. That innocent face, the big glasses and huge smile when he thought no one was looking. Wayo never realized how much Phana watched him from the shadows. How many times he stopped the bullies from hurting him, that it had gained him the reputation of being a bully himself.

Phana looked up as two noisy people walked into the cafe, disturbing his tangled thoughts. "Damn it, he thought, "It's that look-a-like Wayo and the handsome boy. Time to move elsewhere." Pulling his lanky frame up out the chair, he moved to the door, just as Wayo turned to find a seat and they crashed right into each other.

"Damn it, boy!" snapped Pha, "Can't you look where you're going." He knew it was his fault but his mood was so sour, he wasn't going to apologize.

"Buzz off," snapped back Wayo, "You ran into me, you giraffe! If you can't bother to look around, don't go into crowded places." He walked with dignity around Pha, who was fuming that the freshman talked back to him and he still hadn't found a proper comeback to giraffe insult...

When Ming walked up to him and patted him on the back and said, very politely, "Don't worry, he has that effect on the nicest people. We all can't decide if we want to kill him or love him."