How To Write Good: A Lightly Salted Guide to Stepping Up Your Wattpad Game.

Forward

I'm not writing this because I want to, I'm writing because I have to, for my sanity, perhaps for yours, and for the good of all mankind, womankind, and various other kinds too numerous to mention inside the 200 chapter limit on Wattpad.

I'm writing for Wattpad in particular because it's a place where people can craft stories and poetry in relative safety about whatever they want and expect to be moderately praised for it if they get enough people to browse their assorted stuff. Because of that, this is possibly the worst place on Earth to learn to be a better writer.

That doesn't mean you can't, but since few people are going to beat you up in the right way for the right reasons, you have to do it yourself, and that's a lot--let me repeat that--a LOT of work.

You need to learn to be more honest with yourself than the people around you. You need to be able to judge the quality of your work beyond the mediocre landscape. You need to cultivate the discipline to re-read, edit, re-write, and discard parts (or in some cases all) of your favorite chapters for the sake of telling a better story.

I don't expect this book to be terribly popular, because the underlying theme is "instead of parking your ass on the sofa, get up and work it off." I mean that in the nicest possible way. I believe everyone is born with seeds of greatness, but not everyone has the strength of character to make them grow. The best news I can give you today is that strength is within your reach, and all you need to do is choose the adventure and all its thorns and place it above your personal comfort.

If you have the guts to take an honest look at yourself, critique your own work with the veracity of a pissed off Internet troll, and start the long, arduous trek through the reeking bogs of introspection and begin a soul-rending climb up the mountain of noteriety, join me where the path narrows and I'll do my able-bodied best to point the way.

What? No, I'm not going with you, that sounds like too much effort.

~ F.C. Cleary

Oh, and legal, legal, blah, blah, blah. This is copyrighted, but if you want to reprint any of it you're welcome to do so as long as you credit me and/or Firelight Cafe, and I also encourage you to provide a link to the full book. 

I don't give two hoots about making money off this thing, but I want everything I say here to be taken in context - and to take personal responsibility for the mistakes. 

Also if you copy anyone else's work without permission, you're a big, stupid, talentless, fart-faced hack, so there.