Ashlyn hasn't spoken a word since the age of eight, and her heart's never felt more protected. But, when the confident and ever so charming Derek stumbles into her quiet little world, her emotions-and forbidden desires-have never been so loud.
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The flashing marker in the text box had never looked more daunting than it had at that moment. Worrying her bottom lip, Ashlyn drummed her fingers against the top of the coffee machine, all while that cursed marker continued its incessant flickering.
Twenty unanswered messages, all from him, stared back at her in a blinding blue. Twenty messages made up of the same apologies, the same pleas that she would answer, just once. All messages to which she couldn't construct an appropriate answer.
How did she say that everything would be okay, that all would be forgiven when that wasn't the case? Time apart had not changed the matter of his guilt or the fact he'd led her on under the guise of love. She'd been prepared to jump, to give everything up in her fight for him, and a few words weren't going to restore that overnight.
But her fingers had a mind of their own, tapping swiftly over the screen as words of longing and fears, hope and broken promises sprouted before her. Fragile buds grew amongst the soil of hurt and dormant rage that nourished them, a series of fingers stroking and words choking on the conflicted feelings she still wrestled.
I never wanted any of this before you. Why did you have to come along and screw everything up? Her finger hovered over the send button, the line upon lines before her a reflection of her hearts state. Even now, four weeks later, nothing made sense.
Exhaling through parted lips, her mouth formed two broken syllables; Derek.
The sound of someone clearing their throat startled Ashlyn, and she dropped her phone against the counter with a resounding thump. Clambering to catch it before it could hit the floor, she locked the screen - the unsent message still in its box - and shoved it into her pocket and looked up at the sound's source, intending to apologize.
A haunted gaze locked with hers, the breath instantly shoved out of her lungs. Clutching at her chest with one hand while the other gripped the edge of the counter, Ashlyn gasped for the air that wouldn't come. She pulled herself along the counter and moved towards the register, hoping the additional space would allow her lungs to function once again.
"I wasn't sure if I should still come in." The pain in Derek's voice was only a semblance of the pain he carried in his darkened eyes and sunken cheeks. With time, his guilt had only further eaten away at him. The bruises beneath his eyes told of nights unslept, the smile that could always light up her world now a distant memory lost in the downturned line that now filled its space. He was trapped in a downward spiral of guilt, first because of Liam, and now, her.
Her hand cupped her mouth against the sob that fought to breakout. Her other hand's hold tightened against the counter, her legs trembling under the weight of the equal pain she'd inflicted. She'd never meant to hurt him too.
"Hey Ash, can you-" Kass' voice cut out as she bumped into Ashlyn's back, no doubt seeing who stood before them. "Derek. Hi," she squeaked, her surprise evident.
