Toxic Crush

~22~

Christmas with the Weasleys was always fun, but for Clara's first Christmas with them in Grimmauld place, it felt like something she'd been missing.

All of the people and the noise and the laughter created an atmosphere that you couldn't put into words. It was magical.

Mrs. Weasley had even knitted Clara a jumper.

The new year had been fun in a different way.

Fred and George had provided an interesting muggle herb that worked a little like moonshine, and the kids had all spent the weekend away from the adults in the woods.

Clara didn't remember much about that night, but the memory was a blurry mass of ecstacy.

She stood on the station after the holidays with the twins and Ginny, waiting for the train and for Ron and Harry to collect Hermione.

She glanced around looking for her other friends, locking eyes with the last person she wanted to see in the moment.

It was Draco.

The moment he knew that she had seen him he looked away and lost himself in the crowd.

Shaking her head, Clara boarded the train and said goodbye to the Gryffindors.

She found Terry and Cho in a compartment on the back carriage and sat with them until the train pulled into Hogsmeade station, following them into a carriage and then into the hall.

They found the rest of their friends in the Ravenclaw common room, but they only talked for a few minutes before going to bed.

Clara lay awake that night, her mind unable to settle; reeling with the things Draco had said to her three weeks ago.

She couldn't get the image of his angry face out of her head, and yet she wasn't scared anymore.

She was upset, and reproachful, but she wasn't scared. Infact, she felt almost sorry for him, though she didn't know why.

She still wanted him.

In retrospect, this was a stupid thing to think, but Clara knew- or perhaps really really hoped- that Draco would never hurt her.

That was the thought that got her out of bed at two in the morning that night.

She pulled a jumper on and crept out of the common room, headed straight for the astronomy tower. Something told her he would be there.

Upon seeing his silhouette against the moonlit sky she smiled.

"Hey." She said quietly, staying standing at the top of the stairs. "Thought I'd find you here."

He turned around slowly and a strange expression took over his features. "Hey."

"Why have you been ignoring me?" She asked carefully.

"I haven't-"

"Yes you have."

He ran his hand through his hair and pinched the bridge of his nose. "Because I don't want you to get hurt by me."

"What the hell do you mean?"

"I'm dangerous Clara!"

"No you aren't!"

"You know I am." He said quietly. "I saw the way you looked at me that night in the bathroom. You were so scared."

"But I'm not anymore!" Clara tried to reason.

"You know what I have to become in a few months!"

She stared at him blankly for a few moments.