Prologue

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"7 days dad, 7 days lang hinihingi ko sainyo."pleasing myself to dad. I want to take a break, i want to loosen up. Sobrang dami ng nangyayari,nakakapagod na."After all i had done in your company, simula nang grumaduate ako, i went straight up here agad sa kompanya mo para magtrabaho ako,and after that i never experienced enjoying my life, never again", i added, wiping my own tears.



"I don't have time for your dramatic matter, Gaea i need you in the company, ikaw nalang ang maasahan ko simula nang sumama ang ate mo sa walang kwenta nyang boyfriend", my dad explained." And besides,7 days is too long, we have a lot of important prior commitments that need to settle within this days.", he added.



So mental health, was never important to him, huh?. Is my dad a robot because he sounds like he never experienced having a breakdown.Why is he even controlling my life.Kung tutuusin, naiinggit ako sa ate ko, kasi she became brave enough to fight against dad and choose what makes her happy and now she is already free. Samantalang ako eto, duwag na nanghihingi ng 7 days leave.



"Now go and get back to work, remember? you are candidate as the head manager of your department so do your job well", my dad pointed me out.



"Pero—", i didn't able to talk again because my dad already pick up a call. I had no choice but to leave his room.



While i am walking towards to my office room, i accidentally eavesdropped a group of my fellow officemates making a gossip.



" Talaga ? grabe naman pala, sinulot ni Alexa yung ex ni Ma'am Gaea ?, knowing that they are best friends since highschool"



"Sabagay pero girl ang tagal rin nila ni Sir Matteo ah, alam ko 4 years sila ni Ma'am Gaea since college pa"



" Ewan ko ba pero i dont feel any guilt sa ginawa ni Alexa at Sir Matt, isipin nyo mga beh, Ma'am Gaea is super workaholic, walang ka time-time mag enjoy, walang social friends, walang night life, ang baduy baduy, i wonder why pano nakatagal si Sir Matteo sakanya"



"Beh grabe ka naman, masakit rin para kay Ma'am Gaea parang ang dating eh isipin nyo yun si Alexa na nga lang pinagkakatiwalaan nya sa lahat kasi diba yung Nanay niya nagpakamatay, nagsuicide, tapos yung ate nya sumama na sa boyfriend nya, and then ttraydurin pa sya ni Alexa?, im pity of her—"



"Are you all done ?" , cutting their shits off.


"Ma'am, sorry po—"


"You dont need to say sorry for the things that you actually meant for it, panindigan nyo yung mga pinagusapan nyo.And i don't need to explain myself for whats going in my life kasi hindi ako maiintindihan ng mga katulad nyong tao.All of you get back to work!", i shouted which made them anxious.



I cant believe that after pleasing my dad right away ganto pa ang mga maririnig ko. Yes its fucking true, sinulot ng best friend ko ang long-time ex ko,and take note kakabreak palang namin within three months as of this moment tapos malalaman ko nalang they were dating.Hindi pa sila aaminin kung hindi ko kinompronta. Ganun ba talaga ako kadaling kalimutan para makahanap agad ng iba si Matt?, at bestfriend ko pa ang nabinggwit nya?



Hindi man lang ba ko naisip ni Alexa?, na masasaktan ako kapag pumatol sya kay Matt?.



Ang sakit sakit.


I was her goddam bestfriend for almost 10 years. And i was his freakin girlfriend for 4 years....



"Why?", i couldn't handle my emotion more so i let myself cry hard again.



"Tangina bakit?"


My ex broke up with me, my best friend betrayed me, my mom and my sister leave me and i dont have nothing to talk to with....


so bakit pa ko nabubuhay ?


I stood up in my chair and walk to my veranda.Im at the 20th floor, its already evening at tanaw na ang city lights.



Looking up in this view is kinda calm, kapag nandito ka sa taas ang tanaw mo lang ay ang mga nagtataasang mga gusali, making the urban more foster and prosper with these high establishments.



Pero pag tumingin ka sa baba, makikita mo ang totoong buhay sa siyudad.Maingay, masikip, mausok,madumi, magulo. Reality in urban is letting yourself walks in some streets in the city, nakakasuffocate.



I suddenly stop myself for mesmerizimg the view of in my veranda when my door opened.


"Ma'am",. she is China, my secretary.



"Do i need to sign something?" i asked.


"Yes maam, here are papers for the meeting a while ago. sabi po ng papa nyo check the papers", she explained.


"China, i wanna breathe", i said


"po maam ? hala maam di po ba kayo makahinga, hala wait po tatawagan ko po ang company nurse wait—"



"Fuck its not like that." iritable kong sinabi.


"Eh ano pong ibig nyo sabihin", pagtataka niyang tanong.


"Clear my schedule in the next 7 days, im leaving,,,,,, with or without the consent of my dad", i told her.


"po maam san po kayo pupunta?", she asked



"I will find myself......", i answered.



China signed and came next to me."Maam, alam ko po na madami kayong pinagdaanan ngayon, wag po kayo magalala, ako po ang sasalo sa sermon ng tatay nyo kapag umalis na po kayo. Basta po unahin nyo po ang sarili nyo", she smiled at me.


I was shocked, i never tell anything personal to China, maybe sometimes she was seeing me sobbing here in my office room.


"Talaga? , salamat China." and then she huggged me.


"Opo naman ma'am, ako na po ang bahala dito, basta po magiingat kayo sa pupuntahan ninyo, at pagbalik nyo po sana okay na kayo", she added like she was sending me a goodluck.


"Thank you China", and then she left.


Ngayong desidido na ako, ano na ang mangyayari sakin at...


san ako pupunta ?


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