I'll Die For You, Homie

t h r e e

February 21, 2000

Smutt

"So you used to like females but stopped? Or you used to try and force yourself to like them?" I ask Kavanaugh. Its damn near bedtime so we're just shooting the shit. It's like jail meets army. The correctional officers and our "uniforms" is what makes it different.

Well that and the fact we can't leave whenever we want.

"I think women are beautiful, I just don't get aroused by them." He shrugs his shoulders. "What about you? You force yourself to like women?"

I shake my head, "naw. I like pussy for real. I like my females real girly though. Nails done, hair done, kinda woman that takes pride in her appearance. Soft spoken, soft skin, just....feminine."

"So you like feminine nigga's too?"

I think about it before I respond. The nigga's I find myself physically reacting to are nigga's. They're not feminine acting at all. But, Arique got some female tendencies, so I don't know.

"I mean, a masculine nigga makes my dick hard but, the one nigga I fucked around with was kinda feminine."

"He acted like a girl?"

"Yes and no," I say before I elaborate. "You ever seen a nigga and you can tell he grew up around nothing but females, but you don't necessarily think he gay?"

"Yeah, got feminine mannerisms and shit?"

"Yeah. That's how he acted."

"Gotchu. So you like your females feminine, and your men masculine?"

"Yeah." I admit. This the first time I really had a conversation about my sexuality with anyone in real depth.

"Do you prefer one over the other?"

"Like do I like women more than men or vice versa?" He nods his head to answer my question. "Not really, I like 'em both."

"That's wassup."

"So when you was forcing yourself to like women, how did you get your dick hard to fuck them?"

"Shit, I just imagined a nigga I found attractive. Sometimes that ain't work though and I had to imagine myself in the locker room showers after practice," he laughs at what he just said.

"How you get your dick to stay hard?"

"Im still a nigga. Warm, wet tightness suffocating my dick? All I had to do was keep my eyes closed."

"So how many females you knock down?"

"I mean gah damn, Williams. You deep off in my business," he laughs shaking his head.

"I'm just curious. I don't wanna assume shit and the only way I'ma know is if I ask, right?" I smirk.

"I mean yeah, but damn. Ease it on a nigga."

"My fault, fam," I chuckle lightly. "So what type'a nigga's you like?"

"Me and you got the same taste in nigga's."

"That's wassup. So which role you play?"

"Role?" He lifts a brow.

"You give or take dick?"

"Wuss yo' role?" He asked with his eyebrow still cocked, ignoring my question.

"I only played one, and I gave."

"You think you would switch positions?"

Him asking that kind of made me shift in my seat. Not from uncomfortableness per se, it just made me think of that time Arique played in my asshole. I liked it, I wouldn't mind trying it, but I know that shit is going to hurt.