Always and Forever

Chapter 1: Home

"'Wag ka na mag cry, I'll wait here with you"

It was that afternoon of 2nd grade, where my mom forgot to pick me up at school. My family and I just moved in. I was a transferee and I barely knew anyone. I started crying, I was scared that I would be the only kid left at the school, but this kid from my class started to approach me, he sat next to me and stared at me for the longest time. After that long awkward silence, he finally spoke.

"Hi! My name is Adi. ikaw, anong pangalan mo?" he greeted with his biggest smile.

Tinignan ko siya ng matagal, I didn't know what to do. I'm not that good with new people, but somehow, I felt like I already knew him.

"B-belle" I was stuttering, I felt shy.

"Bakit ka umiiyak, Belle?"

"Wala pa si mommy eh" I started crying again, wondering what's taking my mom so long.

" 'wag ka na mag cry, I'll wait here with you"

I stopped crying after hearing those words, I felt assured. It made me feel at ease knowing that I'm not alone. We just sat there in silence, neither one of us spoke. Somehow, that silence and that company were all I needed.

And that is how me and Adi met.

After that, my dad came to pick me up. I stood up and went inside the car. I waved Adi goodbye as my dad drove away. I wondered why he stayed there with me, wala ba siyang sundo? Nakalimutan din ba siyang sunduin?

"Daddy, bakit ikaw nag sundo sa akin? Where's mommy?" I asked my dad.

My dad barely picks me up at school, because he's always at work. It's usually just me and my mom. She would always pick me up and drove me to Mcdonald's to eat meryenda. It was our little moment where its just me and her, without my siblings or her work, it was our little date.

"She's in the hospital"

In that moment, I suddenly felt my whole world was crashing. I felt unsteady and the peace I once found in Adi suddenly turned into a fear, my mom is dying.

My dad told me that my mom was diagnosed with breast cancer. We went into the hospital. My older sister, Ryleigh and my older brother Jay was sitting outside the room, they were crying so hard. As I walked inside the room, I saw my mom. She looked a little pale and tired but she still managed to smile at me. My dad assisted me as I climbed up my mom's bed, he left soon after.

It was just me and her, again.

"Belle, you listen to me okay?" She said, her voice is as calming as the sea. Her hands ran through my hair.

"Mommy, are you dying?" I asked,

"No, baby. Mommy is going to fight this, okay?" She said as she caressed my face.

I just looked at her, my mom was a photographer, but she was often mistaken as a model. I always looked up to her, she was always so elegant and classy, she was kind and loving and most of all, she was passionate about her career.

My mom fought cancer, until she can't anymore.

Adi and I became closer each day and my sister Ryleigh would often pick me up on her way home, her school is just close from mine but sometimes our schedule clashes, and I have to go home earlier, I learned how to go home alone. Well, not really alone, Adi would keep me company and walk home with me, my house was just a few blocks away from our school and so does Adi, his house was a little farther than mine, though.

One afternoon, my mom came to school to pick me up. I was so happy that we can finally have our date again, and that she can meet my new friend, Adi.

"Mommy!!" I ran so fast towards her, and hugged her so tight.

"Isabelle, dahan-dahan lang 'nak, baka madapa ka." She warned me.

"Hi po!" Adi waved at my mom, and she run her fingers through Adi's hair.

"Hello, what's your name?", my mom asked while smiling at Adi.

"Adrean Kyle C. Franco po!", he said with enthusiasm.

"Gusto mo sumama sa amin? Pupunta kaming Mcdo" My mom invited him.

My mom didn't drove, she asked our driver to drove us to Mcdonald's.

We talked and talked. Then she told us, "you two should always stick together, okay?". We both nodded. "Always look out for each other" she continued.

We dropped Adi off first before going home. We stayed at the front yard first, then we both sat down at the wooden swing.

" 'Nak, mommy will have to go home now" she said while she brush my hair with her fingers.

"where's home, mommy?"

"It's up there, above the sun and the clouds with all the angles" she pointed at the sky.

I knew what she was talking about, she's dying. But I don't want to ruin our moment.

"Always remember, I will always be there, watching over you. Okay?"

"Can I just go with you, mommy?" I asked, my tears suddenly fall from my eyes.

"No, baby. Not now. Soon, when you finally served your purpose here on earth, you will be able to come home, okay?"

"Okay" I hugged her so tight, for the last time.

My mom died, not long after that day. The truth that she's gone hasn't hit me until I saw my dad crying and screaming at the garden with a bottle of beer. I watched in the balcony, and sat there watching over him.

He cried so hard and I can only wonder the pain he went through after loosing the love of his life.

We all grieved differently, my father remained strong and composed, or appears to be. He tries to burry himself with work but there are still days where he just sat in the garden and numb himself from all the pain with alcohol. My sister, was always at home and locked herself up in the room, she just sat there alone and sometimes, I go there and lie in the bed with her looking up at the ceiling, we'd talk about mom but mostly, we just lie there in silence. My brother on the other hand, was never home. He's always out and went to parties. He skates and went out with his friends. He would always sneak out in the middle of the night to go out with his friends from the upper batch. Then, there was me.

Alone.

My family that was once my home and my happiness, is now in pieces. After her death, nothing felt the same. She left us like pieces of puzzle that doesn't fit. The word family is now just an empty word to describe people who live together but no longer have a connection.

That was when Adi became my home.