or what, sir? |a. hotchner| ✔️

fifty seven

I stared at Spencer as the jet took off.

Yes, my dumb ass got on the jet. Could you blame me? This was my family, I wasn't letting Aaron damn Hotchner ruin that for me. I mean, sure, I fucked everything up. Spencer probably hates me and Aaron does definitely hate me, but I was going to fix it.

With Spencer, at least. I almost gave up trying with Aaron.

And Spencer was staring at me, too. Both of us looked like awkward middle school kids afraid to talk to one another, it was really upsetting. I can't believe we did that, I couldn't believe our one drunk night possibly having sex was going to ruin the best friendship I had ever had with someone.

I didn't care if we had sex. I wasn't going to let that hurt us, but then again, I couldn't say the same for him. He hadn't tried to talk to me once since we saw each other, it was killing me.

I then felt someone sit next to me, seeing Derek. His eyes moved back and forth between Spencer and I, "Come on, talk to one another" he let out, and we both looked at him.

"Huh?"

"I heard about what happened from..." He turned his head to look at Aaron, who was just doing paperwork. Derek shook his head, "Well, I actually heard it from loud mouth Emily, but--" Emily smacked him over the head with a file as she walked by, and continued walking to go get her cup of coffee.

"But we're fine" He defended, and I looked back at him with a raised brow,

"Are we?" I questioned nervously. Not to be weird, but I really needed to know if we were okay. That man was my best friend. More than that, he was my soulmate minus the romantic part. We were so close we should have been twins that have never lived a day without one another. I wouldn't be able to live or function with out him.

He stood up and tilted his head to the door a bit to have me follow him, so I got up and I did. He shut the door behind us, "Look, Spencer I really just--"

"Wait, let me talk first" he cut me off, and I let him. I had nothing to say other than the pure fact that I didn't want anything to change, so I wanted to hear what he had to say first. "I love you, with all of my heart and soul. But..." He looked like he was about to faint, which made me want to do the same. That was never good, "But I don't want to ruin our friendship, even though we already did have sex and--"

"Oh thank God" I basically jumped him as I pulled him into a hug, "No, I get it. I love you more than you could ever imagine, I just..."

He hugged me back, "Not like that?" he started,

"Not like that" I agreed. We let go of one another and then I realized what he said, "Wait, you know we definitely had sex?" He examined my face for a second,

"You actually don't remember? I thought we were just supposed to say that because Hotch and Emily walked in" 

I let out a nervous and shocked laugh, "What? No! I actually don't remember!"

So then he told me, he told me every last detail. And slowly but surly, I started remembering my side of things.

We laughed like children as we walked into the hotel, completely and utterly drunk off of our asses.

"It's funny!" Spencer tried to convince me, and I shook my head,

"Spencer Walter, if I wasn't a creep who watches true crime for fun, I would have absolutely no clue what you're saying" I admitted with a smile. He nudged me,

"You're mean"

"No, I'm right. But I still love you, though" I ensured, and we got into the elevator. He looked closely at the buttons, as if he couldn't see which to press. I narrowed my eyes and pressed it for him, making him stand up again straighter to look at me. "Are you alright?"