Let's Stop!

Chapter 4: Taking Things Slow

Chenle pulled away a little from the younger. Gnawing on his bottom lip, he tried to find the right words to say but in the end all he can manage was a whispered,
"I don't know."

"I wasn't ready Jisung to face the questions I have for myself, so I chose once to just turn my back away from it... Well apparently that didn't work because here I am now...

I'm not ready Ji."

The smaller looked into the taller's eyes, so scared and confused that he hoped that Jisung can understand what he's feeling right now.
"All I know Jisung is that I don't want to run away anymore...
Can't we just go back to how we were, before I asked you to- to stop o-our show?"

Jisung carefully held the smaller's hands in his.
"Chenle... Isn't that just another way of running away?"

"You know that we can't exactly go back, especially now that you know how I felt about you... But I do understand that you've not come to terms yet on how you feel about me, and I won't force you to do so... How about this... Right now Chenle, if you find that there is a small space in your heart that you can love me even for just a little bit, then let's try to go from there.
I-I'm willing to wait until I can finally hear you say it."

Chenle's eyes lit up at what the younger have said.
"I- I can do that...

Let's- Let's take things slow Jisung-ah."

"If you like we can make specific conditions that you'll be comfortable with, like for instance the things that we expect from each other. And we can add or subtract as we go along." Jisung suggested now moving a bit closer to Chenle.

"L-like a d-dating contract? B-but... Dating? We- we... I mean are we?"

"You're panicking again...
C-Can I hug you?"
Jisung wanted to calm the older so he asked if he can, afraid that it might be too much.

Once he saw the smaller gave a tiny nod, he wrapped his arms around him, rubbing comforting circles on his back.

"We can just call it an exclusive pre-dating contract you know. But you have to tell me... If...If y-you find yourself falling for s-someone else so th-that I...I mean we can stop."
He can't bear the idea of the older loving somebody else but he knows it's what's best for Chenle.

Chenle was silent, he wanted to say that right now he was just trying to acknowledge his feelings not that he'll be finding someone else but... Why? Why is it so hard to for him to admit? Why can't he bring himself to commit so much?

And there he goes again just nodding to Jisung.

"Please bear with me."
He managed to say this in a low tone.

"I said I'll wait Zhong Chenle, so I will never leave you or give up on you unless of course if you love someone else and will be happier with that person then of course who-"
He was cut off when the smaller tightened his grip around him.

Jisung smiled at this...
For all the years he felt helpless and hopeless in his feelings for Chenle this one has been the biggest progress.

He made a mental note to remember this moment forever. Today was the first time Chenle took a step towards him.

Thankful that they are at least going somewhere Jisung responded by holding him tighter too.

"Let's go inside, it's getting cold."
Jisung broke off from the hug and gently grabbed Chenle's wrist to pull him inside.