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Chapter 7

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Louis' POV

"I'm sorry Louis, it was never gonna work" I hear. 'No, no he can't leave me.' I struggle to breathe as I stare into Harry's eyes. What is he talking about? We're finally going to be out, we can show our love to the world, what is he doing? "Harry? What are you talking about? Don't you want this? We don't have to hide anymore." I plead with him, already feeling the tears stream down my face. I can't help but notice how cold and unfeeling his eyes are. His eyes that are usually so full of love and lust are now filled with bitterness and disgust.

"No. I don't want it. It's too much for me. I think it's for the best."  His words finally get to me as I start to break down. Right in front of him. I don't care, he can't- he can't do this to me. 

He can't do this to me.

He can't, He can't. Please.

Please Harry. Please Harry

"Lou?" I hear. I ignore it and continue to cry. How could he have done that? It seemed like he was just kicking me to the curb. After all that.

"Louis?" I cry. I'm broken. I try to breathe but I feel like I'm dying. "Please Harry," I choke out. 

"Whats going on- Louis?" I hear another voice. "Louis wake up!" Someone is shaking me but I can't. I'm a sobbing mess as I absentmindedly think one thought. "Please," I choke out once again.

"What is he talking about? Please what?" I hear someone ask. "Please harry," I cry. I don't hear anything. I'm not sure what's happening. I feel like I'm dreaming, but also aware of what's going on.

"Um, I think you should step out. I'll try and wake him." I hear. Who is talking to who?

"But-" 
"No," someone cuts him off. "Wait outside Harry." I hear. Harry.

"It was never gonna work Louis," I can't stop crying. All the memories are hitting me full forced and I don't know what to do. I want to forget them all. I want to forget them and move on. We were doing so well. I was, 

I was happy. Not in this moment, not right now as I think about those horrid events that happened over a year ago. 

I feel a hand gently rubbing on my back. "Louis," someone whispers. I scrunch up my face trying to keep my tears at bay. "Louis," I hear again. I slowly open my eyes, having to blink a ton when I couldn't see anything from tears pooling in them. Someone is quickly wiping at my face, trying to wipe away me tears. Zayn, I can see him now as I lay in the bunk. He's sitting next to me while my back faces him until I roll over.

"Zayn," I manage to whisper. "Shh, Lou, I'm right here, you're okay." He comforts me.

"Why did he do it? I know he told me but- I just can't not think about it. Does that even make sense?" I tell him as well as try to calm myself down.

He nods but doesn't say anything.  I heave a sigh and sit up next to him.

"I think-" I take a second to think about it. "I think we rushed a bit into it. I- I want it, trust me, I do. But, I think I need to take a step back. I don't want to hurt him at all, but I also don't want to get hurt by him. He says he won't hurt me again, and I pretty much believe him, but at the same time, he did leave me before. He could do it again. If he does it again I don't think- I don't think I could live with that. It's almost sad how much I depend on him. Zayn- I don't want to. I-"

I'm suddenly overwhelmed again as Zayn just nods along, trying to stop me from talking more. I sit there and let Zayn hold me until someone clears their throat. I cast my gaze up and see Harry standing nervously in front of the bunk. I can't help it when more tears brim my eyes and I have to look away for a moment.