Vodka & cigarettes

chapter 1

Hero

Friday 10:30, 2025

"What'd you think about Bonny?" my mate Felix asks me as I grab another cigarette and put it between my teeth just as I lighten it. What a funny name, Bonny. "I told you I don't care about girls' names, where they come from
or what they do. I just look at their bodies and decide if they are worth my money, last night, any of them was at all" I say as we walk through the loud and crowded streets of London to our, well mostly Felix's favorite strip bar, Platinum lace. Not a really cheap place, not any special drinks, but girls there are amazing. "You became such a boring old dude since your sexy Juliet left you, Hero" Felix says and I almost swoop on him for calling Catarina sexy, but then I remember, I could never hit my own best friend. Felix shrugs on my movements and just keeps walking calmly. Catarina is my, well she used to be my girlfriend, something kinda like that. She is gorgeous, her beautiful curly brown hair, her hazel brown eyes, her angelic voice, literally everything fits her sweet charming personality perfectly. That picture of her from two years ago is still sitting in my head and it won't go away.

"She is not yours anymore to be protective,  Hero, as we know and as half of the England know, she hates you, she made that clear to you, you listened to all of us and fucked up" he kicks some rocks with his feet through a quiet laugh as we get closer and closer to the bar. I don't see the point of laughing at my own mistakes.

I so fucking don't need to listen and remember that bullshit right now, but he is so fucking right, she hates me, she left me, she will never come back to me and I don't know if I will ever see her again.

*two years ago*

"Hero, I am so sick of your fucking bullshit!!! You, you make unbelievably mad and hurt, I thought you were nice, I gave you everything, you made me think I was your everything, but God no, God you and me can never be something more than enemies, being near you is the worst torture that I can ever possibly go through!!  You may be sure you will never ever see my dumb sexy body ever again!! I hate you, I hate you so fucking much, Hero Fiennes Tiffin, I wish I never stepped in that stupid fucking bar that night and ever ever get my hands involved in your stupid games!! From this day on, I will disappear from your life" she takes a small break as she holds the door and says before slamming it: "Forever!!!"
The whole house shakes of the sound and hit if the door, just like the earthquake happening in my head and heart right right now. I am fragile and vulnerable like I have never been before, like I never thought it's possible to be. She left me, I lost her forever.

*present*

"Forever!!!"  Catarina's mad yelling voice echoes through my head for a small second, but I quickly manage to wipe it off. I have been fighting with painful flashbacks really often in the last two years and not even going to a bar full of naked dancing girls every Friday, Saturday  and Sunday helps. "I know she's not mine, but I told you a while ago to not talk about her, in any way especially not calling her sexy, you were supposed to help me move on, but you are just doing the opposite" I say with my same cold face and voice as the one I have been using for the past 24 months.

We already know everyone in the bar and it honestly became boring. Same drinks and same girls every night, every time a girl starts another dance I just roll my eyes and keep looking with a really uninterested and bored face. Why am I still going there? Well, to be honest, something in me hopes Catarina will be there, two years later, looking all gorgeous and ready to forgive me for everything.

That unfortunately never happened, but every day is a new day and a new chance, or however the fuck would someone positive think about it. I honestly also come so I can take the advantage of Felix constantly getting me free drinks. He keeps flirting with the bartender so we used to get a couple of shots for free, but then when he finally banged her, we get free drinks every night. I also know that's not a problem since I heard that girl has sugar daddies all over the world.

"Hero, come here, Patricia is going to reveal what's under her dress!!" I got so lost in my thoughts that I didn't notice that we are already in the bar and that Felix is already half drunk. When he snaps me out of my thoughts I can feel the smell of different alcohols mixed, of sweat and the sounds of people cheering and even some of them moaning, again. He runs to me excited like a little kid and grabs my arm. "For the fucks sake, Felix, don't touch me with your dirty hands, this suit was more expensive than your fake teeth" I move my arm away disgusted and check if there are any stains of alcohol, or maybe an unknown cum from his hands on my suit.

"Hey, "Mr. I am an actor so I have money for fancy suits", for your information I need good teeth to bite girls skin, all around and all around their gorgeous bodies and titties" he closes his eyes dreamily thinking and biting his lip and I use that opportunity to escape to the bathroom. He is an asshole, but he is my childhood best friend so I need to keep up with him. I am planning on spending most of the time there so I can avoid seeing naked girls and so I can wash my hands. After Catarina, I didn't even pretend to find any girl attractive, my body just doesn't work in that way anymore.