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2f̷̢̛̭͖̻̟̥̳͉̄̉̑̅̄̊̎̒͜͝ȩ̵̦͗̈́̅̾̀̾å̸̧̺͔̟̰̼̻͊̀́r̵̼͙̼̦͚̬̆̐̿͋͐͒͊͘͝ͅ21?

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Edit: im at like 500 words and im gonna start writing on my phone WHICH MAKES MY TYPING SKILLS DRCREASE EVEN MORE so if theres more spelling errors than usual ima blame that

edit 2 aka another day: so i have just moved house AND THERE STAIRS AND I KEEP BANGING MY HEAD ON THE WLAL ABOVE AND THE THING IS IM SHORT AF LIKE 5'2 SO HOW THE FU-

oh and sorry for the edgy characters, they look cool and i wanna have fancy chapter names like the cool kids

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The world around me seems nothing but an illusion, masking a more truer and real world underneath it's hide. Everything feels washed out, as though my world can only be seen in blacks and whites, me, being shunned to the array of beautiful colours the light reflects. I know not of where I am or where I have been, the truth a sacred artefact bestowed upon those worthy...

which is not myself.

I know I have lost. Lost an object? No. Lost something? Yes. But what was it exactly? What could have been the 'something' I have lost? There's so many things I could name that with uncertainty I could say I'd lost, but for now I'll never actually know if something was lost, or I never had it to begin with.

My name, Jude, the officer Sapnap calls me Finn, but when I ask why he says it's classified information, or that if I knew then punishment would arrive. I suppose my name could also be 1h57-yi90, but a name is a word, not a sequence of letters and numbers. I like to think I know who I am, but there are certain parts of me that are missing, I'm like a puzzle but half the pieces are gone.

Or half the pieces were stolen and hidden away in the bottom of the cupboard.

Or maybe even the pieces are just scattered around the room after a dispute in the family. 

Sanity? That could be the thing I've lost, but I feel as though there is something more important I must find. What is sanity? The mental state of the mind? Knowing what is right or wrong? Feeling a hold of yourself? I wouldn't call myself insane per say, but I know that I am far from sane.

Far, far from it.

"Finn, you're free."

He said I was free.

That sentence lacks evidence, meaning, yet those words are what has sent me to dive into my mind, the shattered fragments of my mind. Hearing the name Finn always gives me a sense of nostalgia, but for a reason I cannot explain the word does not seem right coming from his mouth. And free?

What exactly does free mean? Able to do whatever, whenever, wherever, having no reason to be stopped? Having nothing to tie you down? Freedom is a lie, we may give ourselves the illusion of 'being free', but in truth, will there ever be a moment where one is ever 'free'. We are bound by rules and laws, tied to our morals which take power over the things you want. And that is just a human flaw we must face.

Or perhaps... does free have a different meaning? Does it simply mean to have a choice? Is freedom not the abundance of rules or things tying you down but more the things that give you a choice?

Is freedom the option of a choice not driven by fear but by heart?

Is freedom simply getting to forge your own path with decisions you make on accord with your morals and thoughts?