Sam: My eyes kinda hurt.. why do they hurt?
Actor: Cos you were rubbing chocolate sauce into them.
Sam: Oooh yeaa.
Director: Freak.
Writer: Says the guy who showers in gravy.
Director: Oh come on, it's ALL brown stuff..
Actor: Moving swiftly along...have you seen the new co-host on that show down in studio 5?
Sam: What are you talking about? This IS studio 5.
Actor: Oh, I meant our new extra.
Sam: How the hell can you get the 2 mixed up?
Actor: Whatever.. Anyways, the point is, she is HOT with a capital-
Director: OF FRANCE!!
Writer: The answer is probably gonna scare me, but I'll ask anyway, What.. the fuck.. was that?
Director: Um.. I don't.. know...
Actor: Look, the point is she's hot.
Sam: Pervert.
Actor: Shes the same age as us!!
Sam: No she's not, she's 16!! Do you have her number?
Writer: She's coming this way. Quick, look like you kinda don't care, but notice her and give her.. the look.
Director: Ooooh... the look!
Extra: You do realise I heard everything u guys said, right?
Actor: HHHHHHHHHHHH-
Sam: Oh shut up.
Extra: You guys are cute, but I prefer.. let's say.. older people.
Director: Like me?
Extra: Um.. no.. not like you.
Writer: Wait, wasn't there something we were supposed to be doing?
Sam: Yea, it was something about a vampire..
Actor: A vampire spoof..
Director: Cheese balls..
Sam: Um, what?
Director: I mean blood. Blood.. err.. stuff.
Extra: The sign? Outside the studio?
Actor: What?
Extra: It says 'Another Dull Vampire Story'?
Sam: Well they'd better not tell that here, cos I can't be bothered to listen to it.
Extra: Yep, you're all useless.
YOU ARE READING
Life of a Narrator
HumorForget the story. The story sucked, honestly. Instead, let's look at what happens behind the scenes...