Please? [MarkBam] ✔️

004

"I know, I fucked up" Mark spoke up, looking down while fiddling with his fingers.

The man in front of him sighed, "Well, we kinda did. I am a part in this, right? We didn't notice we went overboard, Mark" Jinyoung sighed, there's nothing more they can say, anyway.

He agreed to it, even if it's Mark's idea, he agreed to it. They share the faults, and they should be making it right.

Damn, Mark's birthday is 2 days, and they just realized now. When Bambam is already breaking free.

"Jinyoung-ah, I don't want him to go" his voice cracked, covering his face with his hands.

Jinyoung rubbed circles on Mark's back, right after he sat beside him. "I know Mark, I know. This wasn't in plan, but somehow we should've guessed the alternative reaction we could get from the start" he stated, and Mark hated how he's right.

Flashback~

"Please Jinyoung, help me. We might see the shippers more but I'm afraid he is getting hated, I don't want it to reach him, please" Mark pleaded, no matter how it'll hurt him.

The latter just sighed and took a seat beside him. "Then just... break up with him and explain, or maybe make a way to get through this. You promised him you'll be there for him. Why can't you even tell him you love him, Mark hyung?" he explained, making Mark sigh too.

"Well... I knew this will come to this. Almost everyone in the industry knew that well, because he is younger than me. He's 20, I'm 24. It's not that big but, you know how they view it. I tell him many times that I love him, I just stopped a month ago.

Especially with the predebut picture of me beside him when we were younger. I don't wanna hurt him directly..." oh boy, he's really frustrated.

Jinyoung got the sign and just nodded, "Fine. But this should not last long, alright?" he replied, earning a hug from Mark.

"Thank you"

End of flashback~

But it lasted, more than it should've. 3 long years, huh? Bambam even doubted he still know Mark better than anyone else.

He slapped his self, as if trying to get the dumb ass out of his mind. "I'm so stupid" Mark spoke.

"Then let's stop, right here. I enjoyed it, I wanted to move on from Jackson that time so I went for this, but I guess we can't escape the real shit?" he chuckled, standing up.

He looked up at him, "Jinyoung-ah, thanks, I guess?" he giggled, maybe bitterly. "Yeah, but it was the opposite result. Still, we both learned. Let's face it now, hyung. We can't pretend forever" Jinyoung smiled one last time, before waving at him and left.

While he was there. Left alone. Trying to reflect on shit.

He eventually walked out of the café, his drink in hand. He went to a certain park, where he took Bambam out for the first time. As far as he can remember, it was September 1, 2015.

Every night, starting from September, the trees would be decorated with christmas lights. And that's how they got together, September 1, 2015. The day Bambam, 18, got together with Mark, 22.

It's their 5th anniversary yesterday, of course he knew. He just didn't talk about it, he thought he already forgot. But he was shocked that night, as the younger let his weak side show in front of him.

He was too shocked that he can't even move, other than showing him the emotionless face he had learned to show when Bambam is around.

And since it's just 12 noon, it's not really crowded. It also feels lonely, compared to how it used to be 5 years ago.

It felt nostalgic, except it's 12 noon, and he's alone, lonely.

He made a maze that even he can't escape from.

"Why did I even fucking messed up?!" he frustratingly asked himself, it was a stupid decision to be honest.

He always cared about what they'd say to them, but he didn't even notice he hurt him more that way.

But what can he do now? He probably hate him now, maybe even wanna kill him. Yeah, that's what he deserved, seemingly.

But Bambam, he always wanted Mark. He's tired- no, he's actually dead inside, but he still want him. His same old love.

He wanted him. He needed him. Even if he knew it's impossible, who cares? He has the fan made videos, he can still survive, right?

He believes the fans, it's still the same brown eyes that loved to stare at him, and the same man who loves him the most.

He just kept telling his own self that he just didn't notice, not until a month ago. He had a hard slap from Yugyeom, metaphorically.

But being the coward he is, he continued it. Sure, he dared to break up with him, but trust me. He don't wanna, he just wanna set him free and let him be happy.

Stupid work of Aphrodite, they wanna be happy for each other, but they end up hurting their own selves.

It was already 7 pm when the two came home, an hour after Mark arrived.

"Bammie!!!" they heard Yugyeom squeal, running to hug Bambam.

The latter giggled, "We're together this morning, Gyeom, like, 7 or 8 hours ago?" he replied, Yugyeom breaking off the hug.

"Damn, too mean. But anyway! You can go and rest, Bam. I'll just talk to Jackson hyung" he spoke fast, pulling Jackson to his room.

And there, Bambam is alone, again. A sigh escaped his lips, walking slowly to his, or their room.

"How did it go?" he flinched, hearing Mark's voice. He literally asked that casually, like nothing is going on between them?

He paused, "I-it went well, it was fun... I guess" he replied, going to his own closet, picking out comfortable clothes.

I miss you, Mark wanted to tell, coming along with the line of I'm sorry.

He wanted to beat himself, scream, scold, and all. But it's done, he already made the maze.

He loves him so much, so, so much. As of now, he could only stare at the younger with such longing, but he knew he has no right, it's his fault they ended up like this, anyway.

It's his stupid reason, he thought about what everyone would say about them, not knowing he already hurt him.