Double Minded

Day 5

        Luckily my parents didn't notice that I had snuck out last night. I arrived home at 5:30 in the morning. I slowly crawled into bed but, I couldn't fall asleep. The events that had happened last night had scarred me, they have been engraved in my mind and there isn't a thing I can do to forget it and I know that there is more events to come. The voice won't leave until it's job is done. I'm not sure if it's job is to make my life a living hell or to take the lives on the ones that need it. 

        "Amber, hunny it's time to wake up." My mother lightly shakes my arm. I slowly open my eyes and let out a loud, annoyed, groan. I roll over on my stomach, putting my face in my pillow. "Come on, you're going to come with me, and run some errands." She tells me, in the nicest tone she can make. I know she doesn't like the fact that I stay in my room all day, and I don't socialize with my family. I know she's worried about me but, I really think it's best I stay away from them. I don't want to spaz out and scare them or something. But, I decide getting out of the house for a little bit won't hurt. I tilt my head looking up at my mom, squinting as the sun shines in my room through the cracks in my curtain. She gives me a light smile. I sigh, and sit up. 

        "Alright, give me 20 minutes." I tell her my voice scratchy. She nods her head, and leaves me in my room by myself shutting the door behind her. I sit on my bed for a minute, stretching and wiping the sleep out of my eyes. I yawn, as I get up and walk over to my dresser looking for clothes. "Don't you get tired of listening to her?" I hear the voice ask in my head. I roll my eyes. "Sometimes." I answer. I pick out my outfit which happens to be a button up blue and black shirt, and black skinny jeans. I get changed and trudge to the bathroom, to do my hair and make up. "Why don't you run away or something?" The voice asks impatiently. I snort and start brushing my hair. "And where would I go?" I ask. "Trust me, I've thought about it." I add. I hear the voice sigh.  After my hair is brushed and a line of black eyeliner is on my top and bottom waterline and I have my mascara on I look at my reflection in the mirror and frown. I look and see the bags under my eyes, and my pale skin. I look bad. If you put me next to a druggie you wouldn't be able to tell the difference. I glare at my reflection and walk out of the bathroom. "I'm going to town with my mom. Please stay quiet." I beg the voice in my head. "Fine." The voice says. I lightly smile and walk back to my room grabbing my purse then heading down stairs. I see my mother getting her shoes and coat on and I do the same. 

        "Glad to see you finally out of bed." She laughs. I nod my head, as I put on my sweater. "Are you feeling okay? You look a little... ghostly." She asks me, in her usual concerned mother voice. I nod my head and give her a slight smile. 

         "Yea, I'm fine. Just tired." I explain. She looks at me and sighs.

        "Let's get in the car, and get rolling." She tells me, opening the front door for me. I hear her yell goodbye to my father and she closes the front door walking to her car. I slowly walk to the car, the air biting at my dry skin. I feel my lips crack, and I walk faster. The sun is surroned by dark grey clouds, storm clouds. There's going to be a lot of rain today. I say to myself. I get in the car, buckling myself up. "We need to get some things at the store and I need to cash a few checks. Oh, and we also have to stop at the post office." My mother explains. I look out the car window watching cars pass by. "Your father and I were talking." She says, looking out the front window cutting off an old beat up van that must of been going 20 miles and hour. I shift in my seat, and look at my mom. "We think you should finish the school year off home- schooled." She explains. She bites at her lip and glances at me. I stare out the window, scrunching my eyebrows. 

        "If you think that's the best solution then fine." I tell her. Actually, I think that would be a good idea. I don't want to risk the chance of the voice popping up again in class, and me freaking out. She glances at me again, then back at the road as she pulls into the store parking lot.