Recrudescence

Chapter 8

Sonia knew her enemies very well.
Her father, primarily, but also the bodyguards—his pawns—the maids—his eyes and ears, even the cook who, if asked, could slip crushed pills in her food. Her mother though was not one of them. She was the only support system she had.

Coming from a less fortunate background, Maria was very caring, but weak in front of her husband. Rightfully so, as he never showed her his ugly face. For her, he was a good man, with a temper, but a good husband and father nevertheless.

Their love story could be described as sweet if Sonia didn't know her father any better.

Josef saw Maria one night waiting tables at a restaurant. He claimed to have fallen in love at a first sight.

He sent his hounds to sniff around her and found out that she was a college student who worked two jobs to pay her mother's hospital bills.

Cancer ran in Maria's family. Her grandmother had died from cancer, her aunt and mother were diagnosed with different cancers at different stages.

When she was thinking about dropping out of college to work three jobs and help her family, Josef, the knight in shining armour, came and paid her bills which gave her the chance to finish college, and her mother to survive the cancer.
 
After Maria's graduation, Josef approached her, and in less than a year, they got married.

It was not sweet, it was not generous of him, it only showed how stalkerish he was, and what lengths he would go to reach his goals. He bided his time for years, waiting for the opportunity to pounce —and that was exactly what he did.

What her mother failed to see is that if she had refused him at the time, his true nature would’ve been revealed. But she said yes, and he kept the act for more than thirty years.

That's why, when Sonia and her father were shouting at each other, her mother was torn between the two trying to calm them down.

That night, Sonia was dragged back, once again, by the bodyguards, after a failed attempt to escape.

This time she really thought she succeeded. He couldn't track her down for three days.

Sure, in the meantime, she became paranoid, and couldn't stay at any motel, or use any means of transportation. She kept walking for days, not stopping at one place for long, not even buying food or drinks.

At first, she ate what she brought with her, but by the second day, and because she kept straying from the main streets, and crossing every shady alley and hood, she got robbed and beaten then left with nothing. No money, no food, not even water.

Traumatized, she went back to the bigger streets of the town, and that's how she spent the last two days. Roaming the town, too afraid to sleep until her father’s bodyguards found her, exhausted, starved and dehydrated.

She couldn't defend herself when they carried her to the van, or when they brought her to her room still in her dirty pyjama that she left the house with.

The second her father opened the door, all her energy came back to her. She launched herself at him, trying to claw his eyes out. Her mother was frantic, crying for her to stop, but Sonia was too tired to listen, and too angry to stop. That night she really wanted to kill him. She really wanted him to leave her alone at once.  

She was blinded by rage. She didn’t know she was strangling him. Her mother tried to pull her away from him, but she pushed her. It was not even a strong push, but it sent her toppling down the stairs.

Sonia's whole world stopped at that moment.

She could hear her mother's scream.

She could feel her father pushing her, and running to his wife.

Maids came from every corner of the house. They were eavesdropping for sure.

I didn't mean for that to happen!

I didn't want my mother to die.

“Mom! Mom! Nooo... please nooo.”

Crying, she approached her.

Everything around her was too much...

The blood was too much...

The shouts were too loud...

Her mother was too still...

She dropped to her knees, her tears pooled around her, mixing with the blood around her mother's unconscious body.

Her mother didn't die that night. She was rushed to the hospital while Sonia was locked in her room because she was just a feral animal.

At the hospital, they stitched her head and took some brain scans.

When the results came back, the doctors sat the couple down and carefully, maybe too carefully, informed them that it showed a tumour... A cancer they confirmed after some tests.

Thankfully it was at its early stages.

So maybe the little incident at home wasn't that bad after all, they all thought.

Their happiness was short lived. After some days, another scan showed that a cancer had developed at the place of the fall during the cicatrization and caused her mother's death after only two weeks, when with the first cancer she could have lived up to five years or even cured.

Sonia was devastated. Her guilt ate her alive.

I killed my mother!

I killed my only ally!

Maybe I deserved what my father did to me, after all.

Maybe I was punished for being who I was.

I killed my own mother! How evil am I!

I couldn't wrap my head around the idea.

My mother was gone!

I would never see her face again, or hear her voice. Her scent will fade from their home and so her memory.

Now it felt like they didn't make enough of memories. There were jokes they still hadn’t laughed at, pranks they hadn't pulled on each other yet. She didn't teach her how to cook her favourite lasagna. The recipe that was proudly passed from mother to daughter in her family, for generations now. Her dress from their last trip to the mall still hung in her closet, untouched, she didn't wear it, not even once...

I killed my mother!

After the cries, the shock, the disbelief, came the numbness. She felt it, but she didn't even welcome it. She was that numb. She was too tired to feel.

The funeral was sad, but so were all funerals.

Family and friends were there. Tears were shed, but they seemed all fake.

How could anyone feel my loss?

After the services, they would go back to their families and lives, and soon they would all forget about her.

But not Sonia, she had no life to go back to.

The only genuine tears were those locked inside her chest. She would not to cry. She didn't deserve that luxury.

Soon after the funeral, her father sent her to a fancy asylum. No matter what shiny name they call it, it was still an asylum.

Of course, it was for her own good. She needed to get her life on track. They only had each other now. He wanted her to get better. It wasn’t what he had always wanted.

She didn't listen to his reasoning because she didn't care, also she didn't protest when he shipped her to the 'private clinic'. She really didn't care.

Maybe that was where I belonged.

Maybe I don’t deserve to live.

She spent three months there. She chugged every pill they gave her and took every needle to 'control her condition'.

But why did controlling my condition give me seizures?

Why was I restless and always dizzy?

Why couldn’t I concentrate on basic tasks I used to do by myself?

She did it anyway. She did everything she’d been told to. She changed her perception of life. She even parted from her friends who were there for her, who supported her and helped her when she wanted to escape, because apparently they were a part of the problem.

In order to start over, she had to leave her friends and never talk to them or about them and get a new job in a new town.

Her father was with her at every step of the way.

She became his 'little miracle'. She was no longer a rebel. She was strong and worthy of his time and love.

He called everyday. They became close because after all he was right.

She killed her mother.

Her condition made her kill her mother.

If she did as she was told, everything would be all right.

Her father knew better and he was doing every thing for her, for her wellbeing.

Life was good, for nine months.

... until now.