My Professor

heartbreak

I rushed home as soon as the bell rang. Finally!

I unlocked the door myself instead of ringing the bell. It felt great to build up some climax before actually getting to see my uncle.

"Samcheon!" I called out looking around in the living room. "Samcheon!" he was not even on the balcony. I ran to his room, only to find our caretaker rolling up his bedsheet and tossing it in the laundry basket.

"Ahjumma, Appa and samcheon haven't returned yet?"

The room looked weirdly empty. Some photos were missing and the wardrobe was open with almost nothing in it,

"They returned but..." she said looking down, "but Jaijin-ssi left."

"Left? What do you mean he left?"

"He packed up all his things and left.."

"WHAT? WH-WHERE? WHY?" I yelled.

She shook her head and said that she didn't know. "He didn't say anything. He looked very angry. He said that he'd never return..."

"no...."

Fuck! FUCK! FUCK! FUCK! NO! PLEASE NO! I searched the entire house thrice hoping that to be a joke. He couldn't leave me like that. I called him continuously for 20 minutes until my fingers started hurting. A photo by my desk was missing. It was a picture of him holding a baby me. He had taken that with him. How could he leave like that. I tried calling Dad but of course he was busy at the hospital.

I felt extremely weary and my entire body seemed to throb with pain. It was terrible. How could he? How could he? Not even once did he think of me? I weeped until my eyes burned with the continuous outpour of tears. The caretaker tried comforting me but she backed away in fear when I sweeped my hand across the coffee table knocking over the vase with a loud noise.

I lay curled by the couch till evening until my parents returned.

"We're home!" said mom as she shut the main door behind her.

"Baby are you okay??" she approached me as I stood up with red eyes and tear stained cheeks. Apps stopped right there when he saw me. He knew and I knew that he did. I stared at him, jaws clenched.

"You asked him to leave, didn't you?"

"I gave him a choice."

Mom looked at us cluelessly.

"He chose him over us."

"That's not fair Appa! You can't make him choose!"

"Do you not know what people will think!? Will he be able to cope with that?"

"He would! He would if you supported him!"

"Sunmi-ya, we are not talking about this anymore. Go wash your face."

"NO! I WANT YOU TO BRING HIM BACK!"

"LEE SUNMI! LOWER YOUR VOICE!"

"appa ...." I sniffed, "if anything happens to samcheon, I will never forgive you!" I grabbed my jacket and left, not knowing where I was headed. I ignored my father yelling my name and asking me to get back inside. What does he think of himself? My Uncle was my family. While my parents spent most of the time at the hospital, it was my uncle who looked after me. He was just 18 years old when I was born. He was always this strong man who I looked up to all my life. I couldn't lose him. Not because of my homophobic father. Why won't he answer my calls? UGH FUUUUUCCCCCCKKKK

I ambled down the street taking unknown turns as I wished. He chose Jiwon over us. I called him.

"Hello ,samcheon is with you right?" I asked hopefully.