Complementary

thirty nine

always attract - you me at six

zayn

Being in love for the first time is enigmatic.

I do not necessarily think there is a perfectly explicit definition of being in love, but I am certainly aware of what it feels like when you know you are in love.

It is as if the simplistic, ordinary things are somewhat amplified. Things like food shopping with a lover turns into an adventure and watching them laugh is like watching the best scene from your favorite movie. Their words sound like poetry and somehow, even if you were sure you wanted a someone with irises as blue as the ocean, their eyes seem to be your new favorite color.

I know I am in love with Carlie because of all these things and more. She makes even the most unpleasant parts of my day enjoyable and I do not think I have smiled this much in my entire life. From someone who used to love wallowing in their lonely, quiet apartment, take it from me: it is possible to fall in love.

Even my routinely actions somehow intertwine with the thought of her lean legs and smug grin. I compare the blues I paint on canvas to the hue of her eyes and the blacks to the exact shade of her dark hair. Every brushstroke and every line is somehow about her. No matter how hard I try, I cannot create without thinking of the person who inspires me most. That is both extremely frustrating and pleasing all at once.

I sigh heavily and put down my paintbrush, stepping back to look at what I have been working on since I first walked into my new studio this morning. Carlie is seeing her psychiatrist, Dr. Kenning, at the moment, and I am enjoying some time to myself. Though her company is always missed, I do still like the tranquility of being alone. Especially in a place as magnificent as this.

It turns out, the studio is just one block away from my apartment. It is tiny and charming, sitting underneath another studio, which a young couple have made into their home. A vine tangles through a trelis leant up against the brick on the outside and numerous windows brighten up the square room, illuminating the white walls.

I cannot wait to add more of my supplies and materials as the days go on. It is refreshing to have a place devoted completely to my work; both photography and art. And I feel very organized, which is something that helps with my ever-present anxiety.

A knock on the old wooden door takes me out of my trance and I go to open it up, only to see Louis. I cannot help but be surprised considering I haven't seen much of him lately.

"Hey, Zayn," he walks past me and into the place, looking around with curious eyes. "Carlie told me about your new studio here and I just thought I'd stop by."

"Long time no see." I mumble quietly, shutting the door behind him.

He turns around to snort obnoxiously. "You have been with my stepsister as much as I have been with El lately."

I simply shrug, seeing as he does have a point - for once. I then watch him walk around the room, admiring some pieces I have sketched out here and there, then stopping in front of my canvas. "This place is actually pretty cool, though."

"Thank you," I reply. "It was a Christmas present."

"I know." He grins smugly. "How was California, by the way? You and Carlie have fun?"

"It was good, Lou. Nice to see my family and get away for a bit."

"You guys stay at your mother's?"

"No," I sigh. "We stayed in a hotel. There isn't very much room at my mother's."

Louis hums with amusement and I feel his eyes finally leave me, returning back to my artwork. "You know, I always wondered why you didn't just pursue art. This stuff is really good, Zayn."