Edit 2: Hi ya random stranger on the Internet! I would like to say, I'm republishing the book because many of you like this book for some reason. Even though I hate the living shit out of it. Also please don't get all offended by some of my old decisions while writing this book. My 13-year-old self didn't know what it was doing. So enjoy this cringey book I guess.
Y\N POV
you walked in front of a scanner. It scanned you and gave you your name and said, " You are a singer/model\dancer\perfect." What did the scanner say i was perfect. Eyes turned on me. I heard whispers from boys saying that I was the cutest doll they ever seen. A girl came up to me. " Hi my name is Kitty, and this is Tuesday and this is Lydia." She pointed to 2 dolls." What's your name?" " Y\N..." i replied back. " well nice to meet you Y\N. You look really perfect Lou is going to love you!!!" " Who is Lou?" i asked. " Look there he is!!!" Tuesday pointed at some Blond hair doll.
I know you hope to go to the big you-know-where And you're here to try to earn your ticket there Better listen now or you haven't got a prayer Let me break it down, ooh
If you want someone to love ya Babe, you gotta look like me (Like me) Gotta be flawless, pure perfection, not for shelf (Not a shelf) And my first impression of ya, as far as I can see (Can see) Is you simply can't compete with my sweetself (Your sweet self)
Is your hair as thick as mine? (No) Are your arms as pumped as mine? (No) Are the moves you got as drop-dead hot as this? (No, no, they ain't) Is your profile half this fine? (No) If not, let me hit you with the bottom line Got to measure up or you won't get eternal bliss (Ooh)
So let me be honest (Honest) I got to be honest (Honest) I'm gonna be honest (Ah yeah) Whether you like it or not
You're much too short (Too short)You're way too thin (Too thin)
Is that a blemish on your double chin? (Oh man) Don't ever walk a runway (No) Or man a kissing booth (Mwah) You're U-G-L-Y (Ugly) And that's the ugly truth
You ugly, ah ah, you ugly You ugly, ah ah, you ugly
Now perhaps I've just upset ya But people, let's get real (Get real) It's the most exclusive club that you want in (Want in) There's a price to pay, you bet ya Hey, you gotta look ideal (Ideal) Or you'll end up in the old recycling bin (Recycling bin) Is your smile as white as this? (No) Are your glutes as tight as this? (No)
Then they'll trash it and they'll mash it into glue (Ooh, poor poor you) Just a flaw as slight as this Just one tiny detail, it's a big ol' mess Oops, oh well, I'm sorry, sayonara, too-da-loo (Ooh)
But hey, I can help ya (Oh yeah) Well, possibly help ya (Oh yeah) Well, hopefully help ya (Oh yeah) But most of you, probably not
Your head's too small (Too small) Your neck's too long (Too long) Your nose starts right but then ends up all wrong (So wrong) Mm, that tiny freckle (Ugh)
Ooh, that crooked tooth
You're U-G-L-Y (Ugly) And that's the ugly truth
U-G-L-Y, face like that, why even try? U-G-L-Y, back that hip like triple fry U-G-L-Y, sorry if that makes you cry You're ugly, so ugly, so... Wait!Look at you, look at you, look at you
I ain't seen nothing like you before I mean, words fail me, I mean I'm tongue-tied I mean I'm speechless, baby What's a thing like you doing in a place like this? I gotta tell ya, girl, you're pretty (Pretty ugly)
And that's the ugly truth U-G-L-Y, heard your looks make you cry Yeah, so sorry 'bout the truth U-G-L-Y, cross my heart and hope to die Woo, 'cause that's the ugly truth U-G-L-Y, love to kiss my lunch goodbye Yeah, you're U-G-L-Y And that's the ugly truth
( after song)
That was rude, that whole song is about judging.... i said my goodbyes to the spy girls. I started hearing a song... i started singing
Why am i always hit on by the the boys i never like I can always see them coming from the left and from the right( you winked at some boys and they fainted) I don't want to be a priss I'm just trying to be polite But it always seems to bite me in the-
Ask me for my number Yeah, you put me on the spot( you blew a kiss to a boy he blushed) You think that we should hook-up But I think that we should not You had me at hello Then you opened up your mouth And that is when it started going south Oh!
Get your hands off my hips( you played with a boy's hair and he fainted but a group of boys caught him) 'Fore I punch you in the lips Stop your staring at my- Hey! Take a hint take a hint
No, you can't buy me a drink Let me tell you what I think I think you could use a mint Take a hint take a hint T-take a hint take a hint
I guess you still don't get it So let's take it from the top You asked me what my sign is And I told you it was stop
And if I had a dime for every name that you just dropped You'd be here And I'd be on a yacht Oh!
Get your hands off my hips Fore I punch you in the lips
Stop your staring at my- Hey! Take a hint take a hint
No, you can't buy me a drink Let me tell you what I think I think you could use a mint Take a hint take a hint T-take a hint take a hint
What about "No"
Don't you get So go and tell your friends( you saw Lou looking at you blushing)
I'm not really interested It's about time that you're leavin' I'm gonna count to three and Open my eyes( the next piece your walking to Lou)
And you'll be gone One Get your hands off my- Two Or I'll punch you in the- Three Stop your staring at my- Hey!
Take a hint take a hint ( you reached to Lou at poked him on the chest then you walked away to the other boys and they fainted when you passes them) I am not your missing link Let me tell you what I think I think you could use a mint Take a hint take a hint Take a hit take a hint Whoa... Get your hands off my hips 'Fore I punch you in the lips Stop your staring at my- Hey! Take a hint take a hint T-take a hint take a hint
Boys stared screaming " MARRY ME Y/N!!!!"
" I LOVE YOU Y/N!!!!!)
i giggled and heard boys saying she is the next Lou only she is the opposite gender and she has all the boys heart.... including Lou's....
to be continued
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