cutting

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*self harm trigger warning*

There is something that oddly satisfies me about turning my mental pain into pain that I can see.  something that breaks away from people not being able to believe my pain. It is almost as though people only want to notice pain that I go thru physically. its easier for people to notice a scrap on my arm, but not my fake smile that holds back tears. 

I dont know how to describe how this makes me feel. sometimes happy. other times calm, sometimes sad. 

but one thing i know is this, the pain is physical, therefore it is real. 

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