Loving you broken

Sherri stared at Raven. I could tell that a part of her was mad that her “man” Anthony couldn’t let her go. She was probably even madder at the fact that I didn’t want her anymore and was drooling over the same chick that her ex still wanted. But I wasn’t sure what to do. I couldn’t even explain the way I was feeling. Empty? Angry? Confused? Is there a word that means all of the above? Cause’ I was definitely trippin. I honestly wished that I had just moved back to New York. I was too young to be dealing with this. Raven slowly sat down and put her hands over her face. She kept shaking her head and then looked up at Sherri. “What are the odds right? I would have never guessed that I was somehow connected to the female who broke the heart of the man I want.” Raven then stood up and walked closer to Sherri and said “but don’t be mistaken. You and I are nothing alike. You can have Anthony. I was don’t with him so long ago. Why he’s still holding onto me, I don’t know. I really don’t care. But don’t think for a second you can just try and take back something you mistreated.” I was still on the other side of the room standing in shock. I didn’t know she felt that way. I didn’t know she wanted me that bad. But to be honest, I wasn’t sure how I felt about her anymore. And before I could figure out what words to say Sherri stepped to Raven and said “We don’t have to be the same, but we sure have the same taste. You’re forgetting the guy you want to so bad loved me. He was willing to marry me. He brought me over to have sex with me obviously because you weren’t doing your job as whatever it is you are to him. I’m aware that I messed up with him, but if he’s anything like the guy he has shown me to be tonight, he will lose interest in your ass too. Real quick. Y’all have a goodnight.” I was shocked to see that Raven let her walk away without saying a word. She looked at me and walk towards me. “Terry if you let me, I’ll tell you my story.” I sat down and said “go ahead man.” “Okay. I got with anything when I was 19 years old. He was the sweetest guy in the world. My parents never approved of him though. They thought he was too much of a thug. I didn’t care. But when I went off to college a year later he really started acting crazy. I wasn’t cheating on him or anything, but I guess he thought I was. I was trying to pledge to be a Delta, which of course meant that I had to stop talking to certain people for a certain amount of time. I had to do things that I can’t even tell you about mainly just because it is against the rules. I guess he took that as me being sneaky but honestly I was just doing what I had to do to become a Delta. Every female in my family pledged. And I got close, but Anthony came up to my school and a few weeks before I was supposed to cross and found my dorm. When he came in I was happy to see him but I knew that I wasn’t supposed to. If anyone had found out I had a boy in my dorm I wouldn’t be able to cross. It was against the rules. But he paid my roommate to leave so we could have sex, but really when she left he beat the hell out of me. I got punched, kicked, spit on, called out my name, and dragged all off of assumptions he created in his mind. When he left my roommate came in 10 minutes later and saw me laying on the floor bleeding. She called the police and I was immediately rushed into the hospital. I wasn’t able to cross because I was in the hospital for two weeks. That’s when I found out I was two months pregnant. I was too embarrassed to go back to school so I dropped out. I stayed home with my mom until I gave birth and after she was born I took online classes and eventually got my associates in English. Anthony never knew I was pregnant until it was time for Imani to come. The whole 9 months I only had my mom and myself. I don’t even know how he found out I was pregnant, but he came to the hospital apologizing to me. He said he wanted us to be a family and to be in his little girl’s life. I was stupid enough to believe it and took him back. 6 months later when I came home late from the store he went off again. He thought I was cheating again and he told me that no one else was ever going to love me. But I looked at Imani and knew what he said wasn’t true. I knew she would one day and I couldn’t allow her to think it was okay for a man to treat her the way her father treated me. So I woke up early the next morning, packed our stuff and left him there. It took me a year to even let his mother see her. And our rule is that she will never be left alone with him. His mother always has to be home with Anthony in order for him to see her or I’ll never let them see her again. And his mom doesn’t play. She is willing to babysit her son and her granddaughter just to see her. I don’t want him. He doesn’t know where I stay and I don’t even talk to him. That’s been cut off for a while now. And I was not hiding it from you. I just know it’s a lot to take in. Especially now that I know your ex and I … have the same baby daddy. I’m so sorry Terry.” I really felt for Raven I did. I couldn’t believe she went through what she went through. I can understand why she would be as crazy as she is, but she definitely has turned it down a few notches. She’s sweet and she can be genuine, but Anthony was messing with my pride. He knocked up both of these females. I didn’t want to feel like I had another man’s left overs, but in actuality I did! I hadn’t even kissed Raven until last week and he already knew how her lips tasted. He knew what sex was like with her when I was only left to imagine. He was screwing Sherri. And while I was taking her shopping and spending money on her she was going home to him. She let him taste what was mine. I was making myself even more upset and Raven noticed. “Talk to me Terry. What are you thinking?” “Honestly. I’m thinking that this fool is messing with my life. He took Sherri and gave her a baby. He had you and gave you one too! Who is this fool though? I’m just pissed at the fact you wouldn’t give me the time of day, but you gave someone like him your mind, body, and soul. People like him make it so hard for the rest of us. I’m mad at myself more than anything.” “Why?” “Because I allowed myself to like the same type of women.” Raven raised her eyebrow and said “and what type is that?” “Stupid. I think you should go Raven” “That’s how you really feel Terry? I’m stupid? You know what? I just might be. Stupid for believing that you would be different” “I am different. Unlike the next dude, I’m not gonna even waste my time trying with you. You’re damaged and you have too much baggage. Get the hell out my house.” Raven threw my pillow in my face and knocked over a glass cup on my hardwood floor and slammed the door.