I don't have hanahaki (Lumine x Kody)

Ch.4

Kody POV
'GOD DAMN IT I have to cough' I yell in my head. I was sitting next to Lumine and he did the cutest thing ever. Man I hate this so much. I wish I didn't have this sickness. I can't even look him in the eyes In fear of coughing and then him knowing. I can't let that happen. That would be the end of me.

A couple of minutes past and it was finally our stop. I could feel the flower petals in my throat and it's hurting me. As we got off of the bus i ran To the house. I could hear Lumine yell after me but I had to cough so bad that I didn't care. When I made it to the bathroom. I slammed the door. I coughed....like super hard. I stayed in there for two or so minutes ,then flushed the toilet and  turn on the water and off. I was coming out of the bathroom Lumine walk up to me
" god Kody you scared me I thought something bad happened"
I let a little laugh
"Oh sorry I just had to go to the bathroom"
Lumine laugh a little too and nodded his head.
" oh ok well if you need me I will be in my room taking a nap" he told me and then walked away.
As soon as I heard his door closed i let out a sigh. God keeping the secret is getting more difficult. I'm kind of glad it's Friday today so I could stay in my room tomorrow.

•The next day•

I woke up from hearing people talking. I looked at my alarm clock
'Huh 11:15 I wonder why Lumine hasn't came in and woke me up to do something' I thought.
I got up from my bed as slow as a sloth. I walked towards the kitchen to get some breakfast. I poured myself a bowl of cereal because I was too lazy to make anything And it was about to be lunchtime. With my bowl of cereal I promptly walked through the living room. As soon as I got there I saw Lumine and Mona in there talking. This kind of bothered me because I thought this weekend Lumine and I would hang out. But she had to ruin that.

I stood there eating my cereal for a couple of seconds before finally Lumine notice to me.
"Oh hey Kody did we wake you up, we're we too loud sorry"
" oh yeah sorry Kody" Mona said.
I sat down on the couch farthest from them and still with my cereal in my hand.
" no it's OK I had to get up anyways"
After I said that they continued the conversation. I wasn't really paying attention to what they were saying. I started thinking of how beautiful Lumine was. Today Lumine was wearing a oversized hoodie and some Jeans, he wasn't wearing shoes. He just look so cute, he hair was still very messy. But I never have a chance because i'm pretty sure he likes Mona. My thoughts are interrupted by—-
"Kody are you ok you're crying" Lumine said.
I Touch my face that's what I realized I really was crying.
"Oh I am crying huh"
"What do you mean huh are you ok? Are you Hurt?" Lumine asked while walking towards me with a worried look on his face.
"No I'm ok and also don't know why I'm crying"
"No no you're not ok" he turned towards Mona " hey is it OK if you go home we might need some private".
She look worried, she just nodded her head and left.

Lumine Grabbed my hands and sat right next to me. "Ok kody you have been acting kind of weird lately is everything OK" he looked super worried and anxious like he was expecting that he was in trouble. This made me want to tell him super badly I don't want to keep secrets from him anymore. The other part of me still doesn't want to tell him.
"Umm ... Lumine I can't tell you" I couldn't even look at him in the eyes when I said that. he strengthen his grip on my hands I could feel he was shaking.
" please kody I worried"
"Sorry I can't"
I toke hand out of Lumine's hands and got up. Suddenly I felt Lumine grab onto my arm.
"No please don't go Kody, i care about you and I just worried"
mThis made my chest pains show me yesterday come back but with a bolt in force this time. I couldn't handle the pain this time so I broke down in tears. I could tell this made him even more worried. He pulled me into a warm embrace. As soon as he did that my crying got hard because of the pain. I know he's trying to make me feel better but he's making it worse because he didn't love me.

" why doesn't he love me"