Would You Do It All Again?

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"I don't want this to be a love letter" Brianna started and erased all she had been writing. 

"-But I don't want this to be goodbye forever, Because I don't want to lose him." She began again, this time she'd be honest with how she felt.

Dear Jamie, 

I know these past couple of months have been rough. The Move, The awkward yet so genuinely emotional goodbyes, The not knowing if this will ever work out between us. It's frustrating believe me I know. I wish you were here, this would be so much easier, everything would make more sense if you were here. Somehow my life is okay, but emotionally i'm on a rollercoaster of pain and regret. I feel as if its my fault, Maybe I could have said something to  have made you stay. You wanted to be an artist, I let you follow your dreams but at what expense. I'm ready now, I'm ready to have a life with you, can't you see that Jamie. I'm ready to e adults but you haven't figured yourself out yet, and that's why I'm scared. I'm scared to e with you, this distance is hard. I don't trust that if you do big things you will forget about me. I know you don't trust me either but I can't help the fact that we were made for eachother. Jamie I love, But I won't leave home. I can't leave my family behind. I know this is selfish but everything I am is here. Everything you want me to be, Where you want me to be. It's not who I am. I miss you, I miss us. But I think it's for the best if you find yourself a little it more then find me. You know exactly where I'll be. 

Sincerely, Brianna.


She placed her pen down and ran her hand through her hair sighing heavily.  Anxiety rushed her and memories fell flat, remembering what they had and worrying if that's what they still have. It haunts her, But she knows this is the right decision. She needs freedom and she needs to let go of the past. She knows that with this will come pain and nothing can prepare her for it, but she's strong and ready to take on the world.

Brianna sealed the letter and placed in in the mailbox, "Addicted to your love and you're my supplier." Then she closed it.

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