Unanswered Questions

To: Mya, From: Raina

NSFW WARNING

It all started the begging of freshman year of high school when I met you, Mya. Freshman year was always the worst year for everyone because they say "A man who finds no satisfaction in himself, seeks for it in vain elsewhere." La Rochefougauld. In our circumstance the freshman turn into bullies and future convicts just to be noticed. In my school you were either a loner or a popular kid, a predator or prey, I happened to be one of the targets for bullies. In particularly i wasn't ugly, in fact i was rather attractive. I just wish somebody would have told me that instead of 'You stupid blonde'

'I bet you wear fake glasses, hand them over'

'With those looks I bet you'll make a good stripper, Yeah if the joint was called Strippers and the freak'

I tend to ignore those comments I'm too intellectual for their buffoonery, their ignorance cramps my head space and quite frankly I don't have much space left. My time currently consists of crying, eating, writing, crying, writing, crying, and school work. I cry a lot I know, apologizing all day for things you didn't do, being invisible unless you're being ridiculed and on top of all that having extremely religious and homophobic parents when you are so undeniably lesbian takes a massive toll on you. My outlet: I write, I love writing poetry its a very restorative way to go about negative feelings. 

"Riiiinnngggg"

I snapped back into reality when the bell for the last period of the day, the period I dreaded most. Physical Education or PE for the illiterate. I had no friends in that class. Even though I didn't have any friends to begin with PE was the worst place to be singled out, its the feeding ground for social humiliation. We always got stuck playing dodge ball. Of course everyone would go after the weak kids first, meaning I was the first one out. 

I get hit and I make my way to the bench and I continued on my writing project for my comparative literature class. I was on my closing paragraph when I heard humorous banter coming from the bottom of the bleachers and a distinct female voice that stood out came up to the top of the bleachers. The unfamiliar voices sounded as if they were ridiculing her in a friendly way. I made a sly comment "Ignorance is really bliss huh?" I heard a hearty chuckle that made me look up. This girl she was hard to ignore, she had band-aids all over her and bruises up to Everest. She was definitely beautiful and she definitely was in shape. "-Mya," She said her hazel eyes beaming as she reached out her hand and I took it, shaking like crazy I shook her hand. "Raina..." I said trailing off noticing  her beautiful curly hair It wasn't an Afro, It laid almost completely flat, Her skin was a perfect shade of light brown she was absolutely gorgeous.  "What you said was funny, I usually win but hey third place isn't so bad," My thoughts were interrupted as I put away my things "I'm gonna rip the balls off Jackson for leaving a bruise on you." I blushed and smiled "Well pleasures of ignorance are just as great as the pleasures of knowledge" I said with a slight laugh. "Your really smart huh? That's sexy, I just happen to be sapiosexual." She smiled, It really showed off her freckles and dimples.

We ended up chatting all period and soon we would go from talking everyday to eating lunch together to secretly dating. Tonight Mya would come over to spend the night. She had immediately hit it off with my parents, she was spunky, she had the ability to adapt to everyone's personality and she could make just about anyone laugh. "You ready for PE," She fake coughed. "Physical Education, I meant." She smiled at me interrupting my thoughts for the 600th consecutive time today. "Yeah I suppose." I utter in disgust. "Hey don't give me that voice, It won't be that bad, my friends like you okay," She grabbed my hand and pulled me out of the locker room and to the track. "Besides were walking the track today anyway." She stated reassuringly. 

Time seemed to slip by as we joked and laughed with my new friends. I was finally starting to fit in. 

school had ended fairly quickly, Mya had insisted that I get a ride from her in her fancy red 1960's corvette convertible which must have cost a fortune especially since its in great condition. Our drive home was silent mainly because the wind was so strong that neither one of us could hear a single thing. When we finally reached my house we greeted my parents and we made our way upstairs. As Mya got herself situated I began to write about my day. "What are you writing bean?" I felt a crater in the bed right next to me, she was awfully close to me. "N-nothing.." I stuttered feeling her warm minty breath on my neck, she started to nibble on my neck. "Hey!" I started to giggle. She didn't stop there though sooner or later I was laying on my back and Mya was right between my legs, one hand in my pants and one on my face. She kissed me passionately and it was clean, her tongue worked wonders. I blushed a deep red color when she started to leave small marks all over my neck and I let out heavy breaths. I felt my heart flutter as I moved with her body.

"What the hell is going on!!" My mother was standing at the door with my father. My mother looked livid while my father just looked disappointed. "Um, I'll go-" Mya said wiping her mouth and getting up to gather her things.  

...

After my parents were done lecturing me we had dinner. Dinner was quiet until my mother broke the silence. 

"You're going to curative bible camp for the next two years." she said with no emotion in her voice.

Curative, Being gay isn't a disease. I thought to myself.

                Dear Mya, Beauty to no complexion is confined, is all colors, and by none defined.                                           -Raina

 That was the one and only letter I wrote her and I never sent it.

Sorry guys If this seems rushed I'm currently sick with a cold. Until next Wednesday or Thursday!! Thank you guys for your love and support :)!!