"Drugs, sex, and sun salutations."
Harry Styles thought he would never make it big, but that all changed when he ran into public relations manager, Celestial Gray. With long lists of problems on both sides and an unusual duo, the two never imagin...
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AFRAID chapter five january 24, 1975
Celest stirred in her sleep, her head moving slightly on Harry's lap in response to something deep within a dream caused him to wake up. It wasn't her fault, he was quite a light sleeper to begin with, and he hardly got any sleep.
Harry inhaled sharply as he slowly opened his eyes, adjusting his irises to the harsh kitchen lights that were left on. He sat up, a heavy feeling on his lap sliding down gently as he began to sit up, realizing just exactly what - or who - it was. Her curly hair lay around her delicately as she slept soundly, and he rested his head in his hands as he realized the two had fallen asleep by accident.
The bottle of wine was almost empty on the scratched coffee table, the glasses wherever they had been sat last, and the old guitar was to his right. He sighed, pushing his knees in support as he began to get up, groggily picking up the dingey black lighter and pack of cigarettes on the kitchen counter as he made his way to the balcony just off of his room, deciding to let her sleep in just a little while longer.
He turned the flip lock to the left twice before a clicking noise released the doors. The balcony was barely big enough for him to stand on, let alone sit in the green lawn chair faded from the sun and weather, but he managed to make it work. Reaching into the white and red package of purchasable cancer, his long pale fingers pulled a singular cigarette out. The black, chipped nail polish that danced over his fingernails matched the chipped paint of the lighter as he struck it delicately with his right thumb. He tore the filter of the cigarette off and placed it in his mouth as he dropped the packet in his lap once again, freeing his hands to light it.
It was unusually cold for this time of year in LA, but Harry honestly didn't mind. His mind flooded with thoughts of Elliot, Star PR, and most importantly; the girl on his couch right now. The thought of her fierceness and independence alone terrified him more than anything else in the world at that moment in time.
"I think we should get you in a studio tomorrow," she had said yesterday. Normally, Harry would have sold his soul to be able to spend just five minutes with a proper microphone, and not just the ones at Finnegan's, but now, he couldn't begin to picture himself there. Especially not with Celest.
"I should wake her up," He spoke to no one, as the smoke left his lungs. He scoffed, thinking about himself actually going through with all of this; it was crazy. He was fine working at Finnegan's for some extra cash, really.
He was lying to himself.
Besides, maybe Celest wasn't all that bad. She seemed to help Elliot, and she seemed to know what she was doing, so surely she could do it again with him. Plus, last night was the most, and best sleep that Harry had gotten in a long time. He began to smile, but soon stopped himself as he remembered exactly why he was so hesitant about calling Celest back just last week; the anxiety that made his hands shake with no control. No medicine, no remedy for it either. Fear.
Fear of rejection, fear of loss of control, fear of power. Fear of losing the one thing that he knew how to do - be himself - and that probably scared him most.
He got up slowly from the rickety chair, sighing as he dropped the cigarette into the ashtray sat on the floor next to the door. Stretching as he took one last deep breath, he began to walk back inside the muggy house.
"Fuck," Harry heard her mumble as he saw her slowly sit up, brushing her hands through her hair and wiping underneath her eyes before checking to see if any mascara came off.
"Morning." He replied slowly, standing in the doorway of his bedroom as he played with the pack in his hands, somewhat startling the girl.
"Sorry about last night," She said, finding the glasses and bottle as she gathered them and took them to the kitchen, adding the glasses onto the pile of already unclean dishes. "You should really do these, you know?"
"Eh." He replied shortly, throwing the pack of cigarettes behind him, his bed hopefully catching them. "Not that important, really."
She let out a muffled laugh, and turned to him, "Would you like to go to the studio? I think it'll be good for you. You're talented and you could really get some exposure with an EP, and while you're recording I can-"
"Sure." He cut off her rambling to agree - something that was so extremely out of character for him that Celest didn't even notice at first.
"-call some people and get you booked at some,' She stopped rambling suddenly. "What?"
"Now." he said, grabbing his wallet and keys as he began to walk towards the door. "Before I change my mind." Celest stood in the kitchen, excitement ready to bubble out of her like a harsh volcano waiting to erupt.
"How soon is now?" She questioned playfully. She looked around to find her black wallet - the same one she had at Finnegan's - and ran to Harry with open arms for an embrace.
A hug.
A genuine, warm embrace.
He couldn't recall the last time he had actually received a proper, genuine hug. In fact, he didn't think he'd ever had one. Her arms wrapped around him, pulling him in close. He was shocked, his arms down to his sides as her head rested on his chest. Celest lifted his arms and put them around her.
"You act like you've never been hugged before.." She spoke hesitantly, pulling back out of the embrace.
"I haven't" He replied, unlocking the two locks to his door and opening it for Celest, hoping to avoid another interrogation from her in the taxi.
