Optimistic Evil

I'm Cold

Dang it, I forgot I have to pick up my things from the locker today! Oh shoot it's already 3 oclock. I quickly shoved my "Im Cold" sweater back on as I rushed out my room with only my training bra and a thong under my outfit. I can feel my lower extremities jiggling in pleasure of not being restricted by shorts. I shoved my mask on and grabbed my keys and purse, keeping in mind that my good friend Chony would soon meet me with my Subway food order.

I panted up the stairs of the school, out of breath. "Damn I need to get back into shape" I whispered to myself.

"Good afternoon, I'm here for locker pickup." I choke out,

"It's too late, locker retrieval finished at 2:50pm the latest, you'll have to come back tomorrow" the security guard answers.

I left through the front door feeling defeated. That's when I heard a familiar voice.

"Wassup my brother"... "How yall doing? yall have a nice day now" the person says contently.

I knew this voice and the thought of him made me happy.

[Inaudible call out] I turn around to see my favorite teacher of all time.

"Hey dr. Walters, I figured it was you, how'd you know it was me?" I ask.

"Of course I knew it was you, that's why I called out "Jessie Woo" he responds.

This was our little inside joke as he was trying, but failing horribly, to pronounce the creole words. The memories of out in class exchanges flood my mind as I smirked at the fact that he remembered.

"Really? I couldn't make what you had said. I just instictually turned around at the sound of your voice" I answer.

At this point we started walking alongside each other, as we were going in the same direction.

"Are you married yet?" I blurt out.

The question boiled deep down inside of me. I knew he was engaged to his Haitian lover, hence why we were able to relate, as I myself am Haitian. I had finally asked because I did not see a ring on his finger and it kind of confused me.

"Well..." he drags out his reply

"Corona messed up everything right?" I ask eagerly.

He proceeded to explain himself in a way that I would not have caught onto if it weren't for my precauciones.

"What! So you broke up with her?" I question in shock.

"Well it's what the man upstairs wanted" he says as he lifts his arm pointing to the sky. "It's whatever God wants, no point in forcing anything right?" I silently listen and agree through several head nods.

"Oh. Well sorry man. God's plan right?" I state calmly, trying to keep the convo going.

"How's your summer been?" he asks with genuine interest.

My heart raced as the thought of me telling him my mom passed danced through my mind. Would he even care?... Would he take pity on me?... I wonder what his initial reaction would be. I mean he did speak to her before, albiet it was to address my consistent lateness to his class.

"Well...Summer was hard" I state. "But school and everything is coming along pretty well." I pour out in the effort to change the topic. I explain to him my future aspirations and the conversation continued for a minute or two.

"Do you want to finish this talk over a cup of coffee?" he asks whilst jingling his car keys.

"Sure why not" I respond as he walks me to his car.

I got into the back seat and he drove us to the nearest Starbucks. We continue the conversation over an iced latte as I tease him about crying over his ex.

"I cry all the time, hell I might cry as soon as you leave" he jokes back.

"Awe man" I retort, letting out a soft chuckle. We finally walk back to the car and he's kind enough to open the back door for me.

"You know where I live right dr.Walters?" I ask.

"Actually no," he replies.

"3247 Riddy Street, you know the area" I say as I watch him walk to the drivers side, while sipping on my second latte.

He sat down and let out a steady sigh. Next thing I know this grown ass, 43 year old man is crying. Yup! Just bawling his eyes out. Snot nosed and everything. I sit there silently for a while, unsure of what to do.

"Dr. Walters... um? It's ok, it's ok. Let it all out" I state as I scoot up to pat his back from the rear seat. He gradually catches his breath and straightens himself out. He then slowly looks back at me, the white of his eyes now red. I could see the pain in them, albeit there was something else looking back at me beyond those hazel colored pupils.

"Are you ok now dr.Walters?" I ask, feeling a bit queasy. Maybe I had one too many lattes.

"Yeah sure, I'm fine" he answers in a raspy voice that made my heart jump and my ovaries shout for joy.

We slowly pull out of the Starbucks parking lot and onto the main road. I look down at my phone trying to find a way to occupy the tension between us now. I didn't even realize that we were going in the opposite direction of home. Still unaware of my surroundings I speak in order to break the awkward silence.

"Uh, you know if you need anything you can ask me right, just let me know and I will lift you up in prayer. It pains me to see you hurt," I state honeslty. We soon came to an abrupt stop, just as I finish my sentence. That's when I see that we are in an isolated Ikea parking lot.

"Dr.Walters did you need to make a quick stop before you dropped me home?" I ask, trying to suppress the quake in my voice.

"Yeah. Can you, um, can you pass the tissues, they should be back there somewhere" he asks as a tear escapes his eye. And once again pity poured out of me in response to his current state.

"Ok. Where is it?" I question.

"It should be right there, by your- you know what let me come get it, its ok" he croaks out.

I watch as he quickly gets out the driver's to meet me. He steps in swiftly, as a gust of cool air follows, closing the door behind him. This left us face to face in the back of his Lexus AWD. He locks eyes with me as if he's trying to gaze deep into my soul. His gaze then gradually drops from my eyes to my lips (being that I now had the mask off) and from my lips to my breasts, which hung lower than usual thanks to my training bra. Due to the material of my sweater it was easy to make out the shape of my hard nipples. We were so close, that we inhaled and exhaled the same air.

"There are no tissues back here, are there?" I manage to croak out.

"No" he whispers