Larry one shots (Self harm)

The secret life of Harry Styles

* Quick note! When watching the video think of it as 'the end of One Direction' I cried for hours after watching it.*

Harry's POV

Sometimes I think that none of this is worth it. You know? The whole 'living' thing. Like what is the reason for it? Our parents have sex and a few months later we are forced into this fucked up world against our will. Everyone loves us while we're little. Everyone appreciates the small things you do but as soon as you hit the teenage years nobody gives a fuck. I was 16 when I auditioned for XFactor. I had no clue that 4 years later I would end up depressed and suicidal. I thought I would love being in the spotlight, I mean who doesn't love the idea of everyone knowing your name? Well, I don't. Because I'm 'famous' everyone thinks that I have to be a role model for their children. I mean I'm only 20! I should be getting drunk every night and doing drugs but instead I sit in a strange hotel room and paint pictures. Now I bet you're thinking 'Harry's not an artist. Zayn's the artist' well you are correct. But you see I only paint with one colour, red. And I don't use a paintbrush as such. I use a razor. Now if the media found out I would be screwed. Nobody knows, except Louis. He try's to help me and for the few minutes that I see his genuine smile and not the fake Eleanor smile I forget about all of my problems. He is my way out. Of course I can't have him. Every time we plan to do something, for example get a tattoo, modest always comes in and sends him off with Eleawhore. Eleanor is a lovely girl but let's face it, everyone knows Louis likes it up the arse. It makes me so mad how modest controls our lives. So as I sit here carving my skin I think of all the times modest hasn't let Louis and I be free.

I hear the door click and a horrified gasp. My head shoots up and I stare into the bright blue eyes of the boy that I love. Louis. I pull my sleeve down even though it's already bloody. His eyes show sadness and the overwhelming sensation of guilt washes over me. I go to speak but he hold up his hand indicating me to stay silent. He walks into the bathroom as I sit there silently, wondering what to say or do. Minutes later he walks out with the first aid kit. He sits beside me and gets to work on cleaning my arm. I already know that the cuts will need stitches. He gets the bandage and wraps it around my arms before tapping it down. He looks me in the a eyes with a look of an unidentifiable emotion. He sighs and stand up. He turns around and takes his shirt off. He takes a few deep breaths before turning around to show me his bare stomach. It takes me a few minutes to process what the markings that line his torso are. When I look back up to his eyes he has silent tears falling.

"I wanted to tell you but I was scared of what you would say. I needed to be strong for you but how can I do that when I can't even be strong for myself." He whispers quietly as he continues crying. I'm shocked into silence. How can I bubbly bright joyous Louis self harm??

"You can tell me anything" I whisper as I stand up. Before I can comprehend what I'm doing my lips are on his. I can feel my problems melting away. I pull back, put my forehead to his, look him in the eyes and whisper with so much emotion.

"You and I are going to be okay. You know that right?"

"Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow but someday." Louis whispers back, his eyes dropping to his stomach.

I push his chin up using my forefinger.

"It's you and me against the world baby" I say with a small smile on my lips.

"And against modest" Louis replays with a chuckle.

We stay silent for a few minutes before the urge to feel him inside me grows. I smash my lips into his. I know I have doubts but this boy will be mine forever and always.

I'm really shit at writing but it's how I get me emotion out. Again if you are triggered by this please message me!!! I also have nothing against Eleanor as a person!! I think she is beautiful! However I still think she is Louis' beard