Sometimes we have to leave our family behind to give them a better life. Even if it means living alone in a foreign country. For Blythe, it's like hitting two birds with one stone. It's her desire to go to New York, and working in the city that neve...
Oops! Ang larawang ito ay hindi sumusunod sa aming mga alituntunin sa nilalaman. Upang magpatuloy sa pag-publish, subukan itong alisin o mag-upload ng bago.
This is the day I've been waiting for. To be honest, I prepared for this for a long time. Everyday when I'm alone in my room I cry, like a lot. I started writing a letter for my mom. I put all my emotions, all the things I wanted to tell her, all my apologies, all my love, for her and for my family. You know why I did it? Because the more you hold the tears, the harder it gets when you leave, the more you're going to cry. From the day I started processing my papers, to the day my visa got approved, up until the night before I leave, I shed all my tears and now I'm ready.
"Sigurado ka na ba na Nandito na lahat? Baka May nakakalimutan ka pa?!!" My mom said while double checking my bags. She doesn't really want me to go, kasi nga mag isa Lang daw ako dun. We don't know anyone in New York. If something happens to me, wala syang magagawa agad.
"Nandyan na po lahat." I answered habang pinagmamasdan ang kwarto ko. I'll miss my room, every bit of it. I'll also miss my cat Black. We just adopted her few months ago before I had my visa interview. She always sleeps with me, and now leaving her is like leaving a child behind. "Black, come out of my room. Isasara ko to, Sige ka makukulong ka dyan mamaya pa ang balik nila." She sat on my bag, Tsaka nag-meow as if she's making a conversation. I picked her up and hugged her. "I can't take you with me. I'm sorry." Isinara ko ang pintuan ng kwarto ko then I put her down.
It's 3:00 in the morning. My flight is at 7:30am. It's a 2-hour-Drive from here to the airport. We rented a van para makasama ang buong pamilya sa paghahatid sa'kin. Ang totoo nito, this isn't the first time na ihahatid nila ako sa airport. I was supposed to leave in October. I was already in the airport, nakapag check in na ako but they didn't let me go kasi I didn't have CFO seminar, if I remember it correctly. It's for the protection of the Filipino leaving the country daw yun. Just in case something happens, pwede kaming ma-trace ay matulungan ng government. The sad part was, I wasn't able to get a refund for my ticket which was $800 one way. I paid the tax upon checking in, Pero Hindi ko na din sya na-refund. I was so devastated that time. But the first thing I did is to get my luggage bags back before umalis yung plane. That night I went home with my family. My mom was very superstitious. She said it's a sign that I shouldn't go. That God is stopping me from leaving the country. Something is going to happen, and it goes on.
But I didn't stop. Today, December 09, 2017, is the day I'm leaving my family for the meantime. I still have this fear of being declined at the airport. We've spent a lot of money already and I couldn't afford losing more before I could even make a penny.
"Ate Ano na? Baka ma-late ka na!! Tulala ka pa dyan!!" My brother yelled at me from the window.
"I check mo yung bag mo, nandyan ba ang passport mo? Ang visa mo? ID? Wallet? Magkano ang pocket money mo?" My mom's lists never stops.
"Nandito na nga po lahat. Tara na." Lumabas na kami ng bahay. Ang mga pamangkin ko nagsi-gising ng maaga para sumama sa paghatid sa'kin. Hindi pa nagsisink in sa isip ko na uuwi sila ng Hindi na ako kasama. I once take a look at our house. Mamimiss ko 'to. I grew up in this place. Maliit man sya, at madami man kaming nakatira, it's okay. Life wasn't easy growing up, but we still manage to live and laugh. Yung mga nangyari sa'kin made me a stronger person.
"O kaway na sa bahay. Matagal Tagal mo din yang di makikita!!!" My youngest brother teased me while getting in the van.
"Tita, kailan ka babalik?" My nephew curiously asked. I will definitely miss them. These kids listen to every single word I tell them. I used to bring them with me when I go grocery shopping. Yes, three kids with me as if I'm their mom.
"Di pa nga nakakaalis si tita. Malay mo umuwi sya ulit kasama natin." My niece, his sister, answered him and they just laughed.
"O baka mausog na naman ang pag alis ng ate nyo." My mom cut them off. "Nakasakay na ba lahat?" She asked and we all yelled "yes". "Good, lets go." She told the driver and we left.
It's still dark and kind of cold when we left. We brought food with us because of the kids. It's a filipino thing, when you're traveling for hours you always bring a lot of food with you. Some of us took a nap, but it wasn't my thing to do anything but to watch the road every trip I had. I enjoy the whole travel than the destination itself.
We got to the airport around 5:45am. My heart's pounding. It's a different terminal from the last time I was here. I feel all the butterflies in my stomach, like I'm going to throw up. I wore a different clothes by the way, since my mom's very superstitious, she told me not to wear the same clothes I had the last time as it didn't bring me any luck.
At 6:45am we drove in front of the entrance. You can stay there for 20 minutes if you're dropping off someone. It's time to say goodbye to all of them. I wasn't really feeling any sadness, not even a single tear. I already cried a river for months and I feel like my tears are already dry.
"Te magiingat ka dun ha?" My youngest brother told me.
"Alagaan mo si mama ha." I replied to him as my mom started crying. "O Ayan ma para sa'yo." I handed her a white envelope. It's actually the letter I worked on for days, and of course a little bit of money, just to lessen the tension. "Paguwi mo na buksan, wag kang excited." I jokingly said.
"Group hug na!!" My brother said and we did a group hug. I took the cart with my things in it and went in line. Mahaba din ang pila.
"Di muna kami aalis baka pauwiin ka na naman." My mom yelled at me and I nodded.
I showed the guard my ticket and passport. Since it's still early, I had to sit and wait for the gate to open. Honestly, it feels like it's my first time again. Sobrang daming tao, Hindi ko maintindihan kung nasaan yung linya. When I heard someone said "China airlines", tumayo na agad ako and I followed the people. Closed pa yung check in area Pero nakapila na sila so I asked to make sure I'm in the right lane.
It's the same process as the last time. I checked in, they gave me my pass. I paid the tax Tapos pila na ulit for the last part. Dito ako nareject so kinakabahan talaga ako. To my surprised, it was quick. Once they saw the sticker of the CFO, they stamped my passport and I was told to go to gate 15. I never went this far so I don't know where to find the gate. Konti Lang din yung mga taong naglalakad so I just observed. May numbers naman na nakalagay. I texted my mom na din na I'm on my way to the gate. Yung gate bababa pa ng hagdanan. Tapos May parang ID pa na ibibigay sa'yo if you're leaving the gate to use the bathroom. I only have my Jiovanni shoulder bag and a carry on luggage bag. It's already 7:40am when they told us our flight's delayed. My family needed to go home kasi my time limit yung van. Kapag lumampas ng certain hours, you have to pay additional 500 per hour. So I told my mom they can go kasi I'm just waiting for the plane na Lang naman.
The gate opened at 11:00am. Oh Di ba? Sobrang malas ko talaga, first plane experience ko delayed pa. Anyway, I followed the people, showed the stewardess my pass and she pointed me to my seat. But because I was so nervous, I messed up my seat number. It was 21A but I sat on 23A, so the couple called a stewardess just to kick me out of their seat. Which was so embarrassing kasi na ilagay ko na sa compartment yung carry on ko. They started closing it so I had to ask for help to open it so I can bring it with me to my seat.
I just got lucky kasi two seater yung flight, Tapos Wala akong katabi. I ate tons of bubble gum, kasi I heard na it'll help you with the pressure. I used ear plugs na din. I was debating if I'm going to look outside while taking off or just close my eyes but since I'm sitting by the window I ended up looking down, it's my first time and I don't want to miss the chance. Maliwanag na din so kitang kita ko ang lahat. It wasn't bad at all. I didn't feel anything but excitement. Sa Taiwan ang layover. And we just took off 15 minutes ago but they're already asking what food we want to get.
Nasa ibabaw kami ng Baguio. It's so beautiful and I appreciate the nature more from above. It's very relaxing and calming. I don't know when will I see you again, my homeland. I never expected to leave you, but here I am. I don't know what to expect when I get to where I'm supposed to go. But for now, I just want to say "Goodbye Philippines! See ya later!!"
