" same bed but it feels just a little bit bigger now "
i turned over to grab and hug a certain someone. but i was met with air and a cold feeling on the skin. my eyes blurred as the memories started to orbit around my brain. just earlier that day, i was driving in my car on my way back home and the song that we used to vibe to, played.
it didn't sound the same.
the next day, me and the team were hanging out outside of a convenience store. they talked about our old games and how you would always cheer us on. you were our cheerleader, so why aren't you here cheering us up right now?
when they said your name, i had this stinging and tingly feeling in my nose. i knew it all too well so i excused myself to go inside the store. the moment i pulled the door open, a cold tear trickledown my cheek. want to know why it's cold? you haven't been there to warm me up. you haven't been there to pull me into a warm embrace when i'm feeling down.
you haven't been there for me at all.
the flame was too far away from where i was sitting. but knowing that if i move too close, my breathing will put it out. so i stayed back and dealt with being cold.
i had no experience on anything, i was still too young and maybe the team was lying about how smart i was because i was too dumb and stupid to realize that i should have brought you flowers during our anniversaries, your birthday and just at random times.
"happy birthday (y/n)" "you didn't get me anything?" "i—" "IM KIDDINGGGG. HEHE, THANK YOUUUU MUAH"
i should have held your hand whenever it was needy for a mate to mate with.
"are your hands cold?" "nah nah. they're fineeee. just continue playing your game (:"
i shouldn't have been playing video games during my only free times. i knew that i was too busy with volleyball, school, and streaming. i should've at least gave you some of my hours when i had the chance.
"KENMAAAA! i heard you don't have practice today, and it's the weekend! wanna hang out?" "i was planning on finishing this game" "oh.. OKAY!"
i shouldn't have always been dragging you down with me whenever we're invited to parties because i was too much of an introvert.
"kuroo invited us to his party! wann—" "we're not going. there's gonna be way too many people there" "but we could go danceee. and you know how much i love to dance! specially slow dancing (:" "you can go. but i'm not" "... fine. i'll stay with you"
all you wanted to do was dance.
and now you're dancing
but dancing with another man.
"i love you kenma. always remember that (:"
i love you too.
rest in peace (y/n).
" do all the things i should have done when i was your man "
~ phewwwwwwww oh the angsttttttttt. i know this is a weird storyline for this song cuz most of the stories for this song are like someone leaving someone because they spent less time with them ya know? comment if you get why this storyline was chosen for this song. ALSO ALSO, if you get the "the flame was far from where i was sitting" metaphor or what you think the metaphor is COMMENT CUZ LIKE
U. ARE. SMART.
update: i finished writing this last month but didn't post it cuz i was too lazy to match it with this book's theme with those maTchiNg hEadErs hehe. i apologize for not posting for a while (:
OH AND ABOUT THE SHIBAYAMA ONE SHOT. yEs tHerE is a sEcOnd paRt tO it. that is why it is called "shibayama" LOL i wanted to confuse ppl and make y'all think that hiroo is shibayama cuZ of the title ~
