Welcome To My World

September 21st, 1999

      They decided to upgrade me from my terrible condition of a moist brick wall room, that had a dent in the ground to pee in, and had a bucket to get water from. They put me in a room that actually had a toilet, a bed (it's beaten up but still a bed), a sink, and walls that aren't always flowing. I still hear cries of help or just cries from pain or anything. I don't talk to anyone here for fear of them making me go insane. They make me wear this dreadful dress that opens in the back still. I feel like everyone is staring at my butt. Some girls are more "okay" with that, mostly because of the meds they have been put on. I keep my hair up with a pony tail a nurse gave me. Honestly, it's quite freighting. They won't allow you out past 8 and everyone looks like zombies. I saw my step mom here. I don't know what she was doing or saying but gave my nurse some cash to give me meds like everyone else, but little do they know, I never actually take them. I asked the nurse later on what o' dearest mother said her response was "You shouldn't question the one hope you have." I had no idea what she meant but before I could ask she left.