Hush

After suicide

Her mother walked into the room, angrily yelling her name. She's terribly late for dinner.

Her mother saw her sprawled over the bed, and thought that she was sleeping. Her mother admired her daughter for a moment, those clothes that she's wearing, made her looked so beautiful.

Wistfully her mother proceeded to rouse the sleeping girl, and her head fell limp to a side. Her mother looked closely, and realized that she's unnaturally pale and she's damp with sweat, even though the room is freezing cold. Dried white foam stuck to the corners of her once plum lips.

Her mother proceeded to shake her, shake and shake and shake, calling out her name. Lilac, the girl who was once as pretty as the flower.

Then, with trembling hands, her mother took the wrist, blanched at the scars which she had never seen, or even noticed, and waited for a pulse. None was felt.

Then, the high-pitched shriek was released, drawing attention of the hungry family members from downstairs.

Her father looked on in disbelief as her mother was clutching unto her, rocking back and forth, whispering and crying out her baby's name. Lilac, Lilac. Oh, my sweet, lovely Lilac. My baby. My dear baby. Why wouldn't you open your eyes and call me mommy once again? Oh, my darling Lilac.

Her father then fell on his knees and started bawling like a kid. It can't be, his precious daughter can't be gone. There's no way that she would leave them. Did he somehow not loved her enough? Were they such horrible parents? He shouldn't have went along with his customers, trying to get more money. He should have been home. He should have talked to her more. He should have hugged her and tell her that he loved her more. Why did he spent the time trying to pursue customers which rejected him in the end. Why didn't he stayed at home more?

Her little brother couldn't understand. Why is everyone crying? Why is his sister not waking up? He crawled up next to her and nudged her. Comprehension is creeping in, but he pushed it away. He kept nudging her. You promise to catch ball with me, sis, you promised! He said, causing her mother to cry even more. What about homework? Teacher said that you have to sit by me to help me, and you agreed. Now wake up already! Okay, Okay. I'm sorry, alright! I shouldn't have yelled at you yesterday. I shouldn't have pushed you too. C'mon sis. I said sorry. Wake up already.

This went on for a long time. Her ex and her friend found out the next day. Her ex went into depression, knowing that he played a part in her death. Her friend refused to talk to anyone, anyone at all, and she spends her nights crying into yhe shirts she left behind in her friends house during sleepover, thinking of how she could have been a better friend.

Days dragged on, and everyone was feeling tired. They all missed her presence.

There's no more laughter in her house. Even smiling feels like a sin. Tears everywhere. Everybody broke down at different times.

Weeks passed, and everyone slowly fall back into their normal routine. Conversations were slow, cautious.

There's still no life in her house. Everyone is stuck in their own mind, filled with memories of her.

Months passed. Life resumed, just as she had never existed. However, if they just slowed down a little, quieten down a little, the whispers of her lingered in the air.

Life crept into the house, dinners contained more colours, but an empty chair sits there, reminding them again and again of the lost family member who never made to dinner. Her parents vowed to pay more attention to her brother. Her brother was lavished in love, feeling secured and happy. Yet, an empty guilt surrounded him. His sister should have been the one to have this love. He tried too. He tried not to follow in her footsteps. It's barely successful. It took months and months of trips to the shrink to set him in the right path.

Oh Lilac, if you have just called for help, we'd all be here for you, but you couldn't right? It's alright. I forgive you.