Chocolate & Pastry (Drarry)

Chapter One

Draco looked up at the sound of howling laughter, and after several seconds of unsuccessful focusing, admitted to himself that he was sloshed. He blinked a couple of times, pushed his wine glass away, and propped his cheek onto his fist because it felt like that might make everything stop spinning.

"What are you laughing at?" he asked in as scornful a voice as he could manage.

Pansy, Weasley, and Granger continued to stare down at the newspaper on the table and howl. Weasley actually had tears in his eyes. Fortunately, Potter looked just as confused as Draco felt, so there was that.

"What are you laughing at?" He tried again, and this time he managed to catch their attention.

Unfortunately, that only served to make Pansy squeal even louder and lean on Granger's shoulder for support.

"Can you imagine it?" she gasped, burying her face in Granger's neck. "The two of them?"

"They'd hex each other within a day!" Weasley cackled.

"A day?" Granger snorted.

She appeared to be the soberest of the lot as she affected an incredulous and vaguely superior expression. It was only somewhat spoiled by the green silken tie knotted around her head. Draco looked down at his shirt; so that's where that had gone.

"They'd be covered in boils within the hour," she finished, and then fell sideways off her chair, laughing all the way to the ground.

Potter thumped his fist on the table, and everyone jumped.

"What are you talking about?" He looked around at the lot of them, confused and bleary-eyed.

Draco held up his hands to remind Potter that he, at least, was the picture of innocence. For once, they were in this together.

"Skeeter thinks the two of you are dating!" Weasley finally spat out, shoving the paper across the table to them and then joining Granger on the floor.

Draco couldn't decide if the move had been intentional or not. Then, he processed what Weasley had said and shuffled awkwardly sideways across the bench seat until he and Potter were pressed together from shoulder to hip, staring down at the offending article in horror.

"Lovelorn gazes?!" Potter spat, gripping the paper so hard it tore a little. "What the hell does she mean lovelorn gazes?! I haven't been doing any of that!"

Draco smirked. "Are you sure about that, Potter? You always were obsessed with knowing every little thing I was— poorly disguised pining?! Potter, no matter what she says, I have not been staring at you for six years with poorly disguised bloody pining."

"Oh?" Potter turned to him and propped his chin on his hands in a gesture that was entirely too sober. "So, has it been longer, then?"

"Stop! You're killing me!" Pansy wheezed, plopping her head down on the table.

Draco shoved the paper onto the ground beside him and lit it on fire.

"Oi!" Weasley yelped, climbing back onto his seat and sliding closer to Pansy. "Watch it!"

"It's cobblestone, Weasley," Draco drawled, though he dutifully put it out with a well-aimed Aguamenti. Moderately-well-aimed. Third time was the charm.

"Anyway," Harry said. "Why are you lot laughing? It's not that funny."

"Oh no, Harry, it is," Weasley snickered.

"He's right." Granger grabbed hold of the table and pulled herself back onto the bench, nodding across the table at the two of them. "Even excluding how viciously you both hate each other, neither of you possess the maturity to carry out a relationship together."