A whole new world

Chapter twelve

Jughead's POV

Betty's question made me realize what I've just said. I declined Charles' offer because I knew I didn't want to work with Betty. I wasn't ready to meet her and just one evening spent together at Pop's brought all the emotions that I've buried deep inside myself up to the surface. I'm dancing on thin ice with this, I could either win everything I've wanted or lost it all. For the first time since I'm here, Jess popped up in my head. The image of her green eyes tearing up as I tell her that I've kissed Betty. I've only caused her pain throughout our relationship. I've never been a good boyfriend to her; or at least not as good as I was to Betty.

- Jug? - Betty asked again because I haven't replied to anything yet.

- Yeah. - That's all my mouth could form. For a split second, Jess's face appeared instead of Betty's and I swallowed shaking my head softly. - I'm doing it for Reggie. - I've had an okay relationship with Reggie when we were in high school. We got into a few fights; almost got ourselves kicked out of school; he hated the Serpents and had his nose up in everything but by graduation, we managed to be somewhat friendly. Today reminded me of my true self that I haven't seen in a long time. The crime scene, the excitement, and my brain thinking on every possible plotline...It doesn't mean I don't want to give Reggie justice because I do. But I can't help and feel some sort of weird delight when I work with Betty. Probably because it brought back memories from when we used to solve crimes together.

- Yeah...For Reggie. - She replied unsurely and disappeared into the bathroom with an unsure smile. I hurt her feelings I know. But she can't expect me to forget and fall madly in love with her. Although I haven't fallen out quite yet... I ran my fingers through my messy locks and took a deep breath trying to relieve myself. I stood up and walked towards Charles' office.

- Chuck. Can we talk? - My voice sounded unsure but I was certain that I needed to talk about this to someone and that someone is my half brother.

- Yeah, sure. Come in. - He was sitting in his brown leather chair looking at his laptop but as I sat down in front of him he closed it giving all his attention to me. - I was wondering when you would come in and tell me what the hell is happening because I'm truly confused. - He added with a chuckle but we both knew that he was right. It's all very confusing to everyone including me.

- I don't know what's happening... Veronica and I went to Pop's yesterday and she was there with Archie. Ron agreed to stay and we talked. She apologized in front of everyone... both to me and Ronnie. And yet I said some stuff to hurt her... - I leaned back against the chair playing with my ring. - Veronica tricked us and we went back to Five Seasons together. We talked and I had a few beers so I tried to kiss her. She pulled away and left. I couldn't get her out of my head all night so I decided to talk to her this morning. - The ring was sliding up and down on my little finger as I was telling the story to Charles. - For my luck, she was alone again. I told her everything and she told me some things. Then things got heated and I kissed her... -

- You kissed her?! - Charles said a bit too loud so I told him to lower it. - Sorry, it's just surprising that you kissed her and now suddenly spend the day with her after seven years of denial and hatred. I mean you even asked Alice to put away family pictures of her when you'd visit. -

- That's....true. I'm confused Charles! Today was great and I felt like we were back to the old Betty and Jughead. When that asshole came in I felt something that I haven't felt for a while now. I was jealous. And I shouldn't be! I have a girlfriend waiting at home for me! - I snapped running my fingers through my hair and keeping them there as I held my head.

- Look, all I know is that Betty loves you. We had a few talks about this, especially after you left. Her whole life changed. She's not the same person she was when you were kids. - Charles assured me.

- Don't you think I fucking know that? I do! And I'm so angry at myself for letting her wrap me around her finger by just a look... - I yelled and lowered my voice after I realized my tone. - She stopped me twice. She could've just let me do whatever but she stopped me because she was thinking of my girlfriend and my life. - I added putting emphasis on mine.

- You should do what your heart tells you to. - Charles again with the wise words. My heart wants Betty but my mind tells me not to trust her again.

- I started writing again. - I broke the silence after a while.

- Really? That's amazing Jughead! - He cheered but I could see the worry on his face after he realized that I wasn't smiling. - You got your motivation back after you met her again, didn't you? -

- Bingo. - I shook my head and looked down onto the ground. - My mind is a mess right now. -

- I think you should talk to her. Tell her about this. Everything you have been feeling since you came back... then see if you can forget. - He said opening up his laptop again. - You are important to me but remember that she is too. Don't play with her. Figure out whatever it is that you want and come forward with it. - He started typing on his laptop which put a period to our talk. I walked outside grabbing the pack of cigarettes from my pocket and took one out, placing it between my lips. My other hand searched for the lighter and after I heard the flickering sound I inhaled the smoke, letting the paper and the tobacco burn. My lungs filled with smoke and I kept it inside for a few seconds before I puffed out a big cloud of it. I pulled out my phone from my pocket and checked it for any notifications. My finger clicked on Jess' name.

- What do you want? - Her grumpy voice greeted me on the other end of the line.

- I just wanted to hear your voice. - I said truthfully because I missed her voice.

- Sure. - She thinks I was lying. - When are you coming back? - Coming back? She didn't say coming home; to my house that we've been sharing for more than two years.

- I don't know yet. - I replied finishing the cigarette and letting out the last cloud of smoke from my lungs.

- I moved to Danny's for a while. - She said hesitating at first but then her words shocked me.

- Danny? As in Daniel, your ex who acts like he's more into guys but has been trying to sleep with you since we are together? - I was getting angrier with every second.

- Since we were together you mean. - Her words hurt. - He's been taking care of me and reassured me about how much of an asshole you are. -

- I'm not Jess! I told you, I needed this time alone so I could figure something out for my book! The deadline is almost over and I still haven't finished it! - I snapped at her and got inside the car driving back to Five Seasons.

- You and your fucking book! Can you care about anything else other than your book?! -

- I do care! I fucking care because I do this for a living Jessica! How the fuck would I be able to afford an apartment like that in the center of New York?! I work my ass off and all you do is whine about it instead of making sure I'm motivated enough. - As soon as I said those words I knew it was a mistake.

- Let me be clear again, Forsythe: I'm not Betty Cooper and I will never be her. You could never understand that. - Her voice was lower now; I could hear tears flooding over her eyes. She's feisty but in the end, she'd always cry. That's how her personality is.

- I'm sorry. - That's all I could say. I couldn't be more sorry than I was for using this girl for years just to ease my own mind. In the end, I wasn't any better than Betty. I was worse. Jessica hung up on me as I parked Veronica's car in front of the hotel. I need a shower to clean my body and mind. I have to think this over and come up with something or I could lose both Betty and Jess. Well, I think I've already lost Jess but the woman I wanted all my life is still there. Veronica called after my shower to inform me that she was going to get Chad from the nearest airport. I needed a drink and after seeing that the fridge was empty I decided to go out. I grabbed my jacket and headed to Pop's but instead of staying upstairs, I walked down to La Bonne Nuit. I'm surprised this place is still up. The many things that happened in this building...  I sat down on a barstool and ordered a glass of bourbon from the bartender girl.

- Jughead? - A familiar voice called from the back.