markoeun : bye (on hold)

ch 1: muse

mark lee's pov

i feel too sick to get up but i have to, today is the last filming for King of Masked Singer and i can't be late.

"mark!" called my manager.

"coming hyung!".
'can't i just take this blanket with me?' i whined internally.

- time skip -

: 3rd person's pov :

"mark, wake up! we'veve arrived."

"arghhh give me a second.." groans mark while he struggles to open his eyes.

'fuck there's so many of them' the young man curses under his breath.

"MARK OPPAAAA!" "MARK LEE YOU'RE MINE!" "MARKKKK FIGHTING!" "I LOVE YOU MARK LEE!".
the filming location is swarmed by nctzens that never fail to show support and express their love for nct. some are fansites doing their jobs on behalf of the fans who are unable to see mark lee in flesh, some are holding banners and waving their lightsticks.

a kpop idol's way to his schedule isn't complete without sasaeng fans attempting to be recognized by him, crossing over the barricades trying to get close, basically throwing themselves into a field of war with security, managers and healthy-brained fans attempting to stop them.

don't get me wrong, i love hearing their cheers, they really lift my mood up but some of them are crossing the line.

모든 세상 가득 우리들 목소리가 울려퍼지는 그날 그 때까지
"let's promise that someday, our voice will be heard by the whole world".

out of nowhere he thinks of those days, when he yearned so hard for a debut, days he worked his ass off in order to fulfill that promise, which in the end, couldn't come true.

he put his mask and glasses on, flashing an eye smile mimicking jeno's, grabbing onto his manager's jacket, pushing through the frantic crowd, praying for his poor eardrums. it is hectic, but they manage to escape the crowd and go straight into KBS's building.

mark slows down on his walking pace, knowing he's now free from paparazzi. on the way to his waiting room, as he passes by the corridor where the waiting rooms provided for contestants are filled with singing voices as they prepare prepare for their performance.

then he hears it. the pleasent voice that always helped him through those tough days. oh how he longs for that voice, although unsure if it really is the one he's been dying to drown himself in again for the past 6 years. once is enough, he wishes to spend one day, or even just a moment with her if he could.

영원히 이게 끝이 아니길?
나에게는 우리 추억이 잊지 못할 선물 같아."
"help me stars, you are my sky. this isn't the end right? all those memories we made are like an unforgettable gift to me"

mark listens attentively to the singing voice, warmth spreads throughout his lonely chest.

"널 만나고 싶어 되돌리고 싶어"
"i want to meet you, i want to turn back"

oblivious to his own action, mark stops on his track and is stands still while droplets of tears fall, tickling his face, blurring his sight. all the fond days they spent together washing over his blank mind making his fingertips turn cold and tremble.