Undecided

XIIII

I rubbed my hands together as the cold started to get to me. The main part about the wintertime I hated was the harsh coldness. Warming my car up was the worst. A few minutes passed, and the cold air coming out of my vents began to warm up. I entered my doctor's office's address into Google Maps and started on the road.

Sitting in the empty car, by myself, I had nothing to do but think about the Christmas dinner debacle, my parents, Paige, and everything else. I exhaled as I thought about how crazy my life had become after college and moving back to Colorado. I quickly arrived to my OB/GYN and I parked, carefully.

It took me a minute to finally get out of the car because I had to wrap my mind around the fact I was expecting my first child and I couldn't even have the father present at my first doctor's appointment. Deciding not to dwell on the situation and dampen my mood, I quickly got out of the car and rushed inside. I made my way to the front desk and stopped in my tracks when I heard Lucas' voice.

"Bruh, why couldn't you get a later appointment? It's bad enough, we have to come here every damn three days now. I could be in my bed sleeping," he said complaining.

For a brief second, a deep fear set inside of my body. I didn't know what to do or think. Against Keon's judgment, I hadn't taken any of the men that he had once again hired for around the clock watch. I had no clue what Lucas' intentions were and I felt uneasy going to my seat after telling the woman my name and appointment time.

I felt eyes staring into the side of my face and I looked over to see the eyes belonged to Kayla, Lucas' sister. She had a huge belly, indicating she was almost due. I kept her stare for a few seconds until she turned her glare towards her brother. She leaned over to whisper into his ear and he quickly looked up at me.

"Kayla Brown, you're ready to be examined," A middle aged nurse came to the front, signaling for Kayla to follow her to the back.

After she went to the back, Lucas made his way over to where I sat.

"Long time no see."

I exhaled, clearly fed up. "Look, Lucas, if you tryna start shit, I suggest you move around. You know just like I know if I wanted to I could have you and your sister dead within seconds. My mind is all over the place right now so I dont need the drama."

"Bro, chill. I just came over here to apologize and to catch up with you. We were together for four years. We cant just act like we dont know eachother in person. As far as your weak ass boyfriend, I'll be happy to run into him. I owe him for that lame ass shit he pulled tryna send his weak ass niggas at me."

I scoffed, "Oh now you wanna act like we're together? Last time I seen you, you was choking the fucking life outta me. Besides that, I dont even know who you are any more. You were involved with a nine-year-old child fucking dying. You and his sick ass baby mama. You treated me like shit the whole four years considering you were cheating with Paige. Yeah, remember her? The girl who's son you killed and also killed her? Weak ass niggas? Lucas you and I both know you're trying to be something you're not. How you wait until twenty-five to start wanna be a hood nigga? You need to get a fucking life. I am happy in my relationship and we are expecting a baby."

With that, I got up and moved to the other side of the room to wait until my name was called. From across the room, I could feel Lucas staring at me but I didn't give him the satisfaction of looking back up at him.