CROSSPOSTS |FROM MY AO3|

DEAR CONNOR MURPHY | DEH

September 7, 2017:

Dear Connor Murphy,

The school guidance counselor told me to write you this letter. Said it would help. I don't know if I believe that. I don't need help. I don't need your help, or the guidance counselor's help, or my parents' help, or even your best friend Evan's help. Why should I even care about you?

Okay, the guidance counselor won't like that. My bad.

I don't know what else to say. I have jazz band later tonight, so I want to get this over with. You should've came sometime.

Look at me, talking to you like I think you can hear me. I'm crazy. You're crazy. We're all crazy.

The guidance counselor probably won't like that either. Oops.

Sincerely,

Zoe Murphy

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September 10, 2017:

Dear Connor Murphy,

Apparantly that wasn't a once-off deal. I'm supposed to keep writing these.

Your best friend, Evan, talks to me sometimes. He's really nice, and he understands me more than you ever did. Screw the guidance counselor, I can say what I want.

What did you see in him? Was he nice to you? Understanding? Understandable?

Why didn't you just shove him aside the way you did everyone else, including me?

You're an engima. I'll never understand you.

Sincerely,

Zoe Murphy

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September 23, 2017:

Dear Connor Murphy,

Evan's told me some interesting things. He says that you talked about me? Is that true? It must be, Evan's many things but not a liar.

He kissed me too, but that isn't important. I don't feel that way about him. I don't want to hurt him, though. We're too alike, me and him. Too fragile to do anything but fall apart. I wonder how he really broke his arm. I have some suspicions... but I still wonder.

Anyways, he told me you really did love me, you just didn't know how to tell me. He said you liked when I dyed my hair, and how I drew stars on my jeans when I was bored. He said you liked how I smiled, and how I danced.

Why didn't you tell me?

Sincerely, your sister,

Zoe

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October 3, 2017:

Dear Connor Murphy,

Guess what, you're famous!

Evan made a video about you for something my friend Alana calls the Connor Project. I know you'd hate that name, but it's too late to change it now. It has thousands of views and likes. Congratulations, you made your mark.