ghosting | wilbur soot oneshots

bad person..?

a/n : hiya hey! new book for wilbur angstshots. recently i've had ghostbur brainrot so why not make a oneshot for the lovely lad! oh and important question what are you triggers?

1503 words (minus a/n)
tw : amnesia , heavily implied death

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i remember starting l'manburg for people's freedom. i remember sally.. i remember winning the election but tubbo says that's wrong.. i remember i had a son.. i had a son right? his name was.. was it.. milo? no that's not it..

i can barely remember my time alive. i don't know if i was a bad guy. tubbo says i was a good person that did bad things but maybe he says that to not hurt my feelings. i get a flash of relief when my mind thinks of pressing the button in a weird room. apparently i blew up l'manburg but i don't even remember blowing it up.. was it the button that did it? why was i relieved while doing harm..?

i can't remember how i was. i remember doing good things but then people say that i did bad things. i can't remember if i was a good president all i can remember is going into a fight.. uhm.. it goes blank but then we won and then.. i looked sad and i was screaming into my pillow late at night and crying myself to sleep. then there's the election.. blank.. a cave.. blank and then i'm dead..

phil says i'm not a scary ghost. that's good. people seem to like me better now that i'm dead. i don't really like being dead is quite boring but if people like me better then i guess it's fine.

tommy was important to me right? i think he's my brother.. that's what phil says anyways. i remember techno though but i remember not trusting him much. i don't know why i didn't trust him he seems cool. i've been told that fundy's my son but i don't really remember him.. is he my son? i'm proud of him anyways.

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ghosts don't need sleep but i still sleep to feel normal. sometimes it backfires on me. i have dreams remembering my death and how it felt to die.

i don't like remembering it.

it feel like a sharp item was shoved into my stomach slowly until being quickly shoved in. my bones felt like they were being pressed together until they shattered. my breaths were fast and painful until they stopped.

it's not a pleasant way to die. it's not pleasant that the pain enhanced because it was a loved one doing the deed.

but the death gave me peace. even though it's boring being dead. there's nothing. i saw god's eyes and he doesn't exist. there's no heaven or hell yet i somehow went to hell twice. it's confusing it's boring and i'm cold.

i don't know how to feel. i don't know how to remember i don't know if i want to remember. was i a good person? i don't feel like one. i was told i hurt them, i'm sorry.. i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry.. i'm sorry i hurt them. i'm sorry i can't remember hurting them. i'm sorry i betrayed them.

i'm sorry..

i'm cold..

the pains returning i don't like it. i don't like the pain. i don't like feeling it again. removed the sword please.. please remove it.. please.. i'm sorry.. please..

please.. i'm sorry i failed at being a good person when i was alive.. i'm sorry i'm trying i swear..

my hands are clenching the spot where he stabbed me. near my chest and down to my stomach. it's bleeding. there's blood. make it stop make it go away.