Rant/Vent Book....

1

I've seen this girl around my school quite a few times but am more amazed evreyone.

I want more than anything to hear her voice and stand by her side, yet I have not been brave enough to open my mouth to speak in her Presense quite yet.

We've spoken a few times but it gives me more butterfly's as I recall.

I'm pretty sure she's into girls but that doesn't mean she would ever love me when she's seen other girls I could never compete with if I tried.

With her vibrant hair and my ugly locks.

Her eyes and smile that melt my heart, and my cold eyes and dark hair that no one bats an eye at.

She seems confident while I question myself Evrey night.

She seems to love her life, I hate mine.

While I can't confirm these things, judging by her appearance, I assume them to me true.

Yes I'm aware it's wrong to judge by appearance, but it's impossible not to notice the obvious.

The way her eyes sparkle and crinkle up when she smiles, how her voice gives me flutters.

How she wants to help the world and do good.

How I want to run into her arms and be protected as she towers over me by a few inches and runs fingers through my hair.

I'm used to to always taking care of people and of course the taller one doesn't always take care of the shorter one and I would take any chance I could get to be with her but I need someone to take care of and hold me.

I'm not sure why my type is people with dyed and cut hair and emos, that goes for her and this girl that complimented my pride bracelets. And a few fictioal crushes...

Even though I know I have no chance, I can't help myself from dreaming about her....

She's probably already dating someone and I wouldn't blame them, she's beautiful but she wants to be a paramedic and change the world, proving that she's a good person.

Me, I wanna be an LGBTQ+ rights activist and a writer and media producer for YouTube and my own stories.

I would be a doctor but I hate blood and my grades aren't good enough. But I admire them so much, a retired emergancy responder being in the right place at the right time is the only reason one of my family members is alive right now.

Plus it pays to be married to a doctor or someone in that business, not saying that I'm a good digger to only use for money but it's still good.

I mean she would amazing whether she was a paramedic or a pig farmer.

My friends tell me I should just go for it but as soon as she pops into my brain it makes everything else fade away and my brain blanks.

We made eye contact the other day and it felt like my world slowed and we were the only people in the room.

Of course I've spoken a couple small times to her but never an in depth conversation.

I want to so bad but my body won't let me. I guess it's because my heart is still healing over my last breakup but should that really stop me from being her friend?

Of course I want to be more but I don't wanna be hurt or hurt her and we're still so young.

She's thriving and I'm questionible.

She's perfect and I'm nothing in comparison.