Baby Brother

33- The Origins

~James's Perspective~
Joshua had fallen asleep on the way to my apartment. As soon as o open the door, my dog, Asher, greeted us happily. I try to calm him down, trying not to wake the baby. I decided it'd be best to lay him on the couch, bundled with blankets incase his diaper leaks. I love him, but I don't want to wash my sheets. As I finished tucking him in, I snapped a picture, thinking he was absolutely adorable, especially with his ladybug pacifier in his mouth. What a cutie.
I remember when I had first got it for him. It was an odd night, something he regretted, but little did he know he won my heart even more. We were both seniors in high school when we met, he was having a hard time trying to keep up with school and work while also trying to juggle rent. I admit, I did feel bad for him, even offering him a place to stay with me and my ma. It broke my heart to find out he was doing it all for his brother. After meeting him, I knew I had to do something to help them. I had done some research on ways to help him relieve himself, take off some stress from his shoulders.
That's when I came across the perfect solution, but didn't want to scare him away. I needed a plan. I had taken him out one evening, noticing how exhausted he was and clearly needing a break, as usual. We spent the day with hanging around a few stores before I had "jokingly" offered to take him to the toddler section. I was a bit surprised to find out that he enjoyed it a lot, saying how he wants kids someday. I thought it was cute how giddy he got over the toys and pacifiers and all the other stuff. That's when I had explained to him my idea. He was a blushing mess; it was adorable.
He was completely opposed of it. I told him we'd start slow to see how he liked it, telling him to go pick out a stuffie and a pacifier. He reluctantly agreed, which was much of a relief to me and a big shock. I got quite annoyed when he insisted on paying for the two things. I had told him that I was going to be his caregiver and that I was going to pay for things and take care him him; I brushed over the fact he barely had any money to scrape by. It broke my heart when he started sobbing right then and there at the cash register. I held him close and didn't let him go, paying for the things and taking him out to the car before giving him the objects. That's when I knew that this was for him. This was a part of him that he never knew was there. Ever since then, those two object always seemed to calm him down. Especially his little sharky stuffie; that was his favorite.
I love you baby boy. I hope you feel better my love. I laid him down in his crib and turn off the lights, his princess nightlight flicked on as I began to sing him a little lullaby to help him go to sleep. It made me smile, hearing his soft snores from behind the pacifier. It was so cute. Too bad he wasn't this easy all the time. Must've been a rough few days for the little guy. I mean, he did slip in front of his brothers, who were more than accepting, but I knew to him it wasn't okay. I know it had to have been more stressful for him than anything. I know it's gonna be a lot, but I also know that I was the only one he will trust to help him. I love how much he trusted me, and I don't want to let him down.